The jokes
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to take Snoop Dogg for a walk.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to put Vin Diesel in her gas tank.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to mop the floor with Taylor Swift.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to ring Kristen Bell.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to skim Dwayne Johnson across a lake.
Why did the chickens cross the road?
To get to KFC.
Me. I am the joke.
Did I ever tell you my father should have been on the plane that crashed into the Twin Towers?
But that's just my opinion.
Did you know the F in orphan stands for family... Oh wait, haha.
We should stop making jokes about orphans before they tell their parents... Oh, continue.
Some guy came to me and said, "I'm your dad's friend. He asked me to pick you up."
*Laughing freaking hard* and told him, "Did you dig the grave?"
Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the car.
A train walks into a bar. It says to the barkeeper, "I'll have a gallon of ale."
"A gallon?" the barkeeper asks.
"Yes," replies the train, "I always end up chugging it."
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Only the apple got picked up.
Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.
A man went to the library and asked for a book about suicide. The librarian said, "Go away, you won’t bring it back."
Sonic says... April 1st is the best day to do a school shooting. They will think it’s a joke! 😃
Why is a giraffe's neck so long?
Because his head is so high up in the air.
What's the difference between a golfer and a fisherman? A fisherman has to bring proof back.
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
So they could be wanted.
What is the difference between an orphan and a snake?
A snake has a home to go to underground.
Two gays are getting ready for Christmas... They are expecting a big package in the mail!
A salamander came by me the other day and he AXOLOTL questions. Ba dum tss!!!
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple can trace back its family tree.
Me: Hey, do you live in the ocean?
Random guy: Why?
Me: Because you look like a whale.