SOS jokes

My grandma told me I was next at my brother's wedding, so I told her she was next at her husband's funeral.

Yo mama was so fat that when she stepped on the scale the scale said: "You gained another pound, nice going fatso, a few more ounces and you can qualify for your own zip code!"

Yo mama was so fat that when she stepped on the scale, the scale said: "OOOWWWWW!!!! Get off me, you overweight bucket of lard."

The kid in the wheelchair was getting bullied, so I encouraged him to stand up for himself. I don't know why he started crying.

Your mama so fat that when she sits around the house, she literally sits around the house.