When Stephen Hawking entered Heaven and met with the Lord, after a short interview God asked: "Hey Stephen, I need you to explain to me how does all this stuff work?"
Yo mama so short, she wakes up every day in a brick house singing “Everything is Awesome”.
People say that life is short.
I say... life is the longest thing we ever do.
A husband and a wife have four children. The oldest three are tall with blonde hair. The youngest is short with brown hair. The husband was on his deathbed and said, "Honey, can you be completely honest with me? Is our youngest son mine?" The wife says, "I swear to all that is holy, he is your son." Then the husband died and the wife muttered, "Thank god he didn't ask about the other three."
What's the name for a short legged tramp?
A low-down bum.
My midget landlord told me to pack my things up and that I've got 30 minutes to get out. That's short notice!
My short friend called me a scrub, even though he was the one below me.
Yo momma so short... You can see her feet on her driver's license photo!
What do you call a short black person?
By their name, you racist!
Why did the pirate kids ride the short bus to school?
Because they were retarrrrrrrrrded.
