Reason jokes
Why did the brother cross the road? Because the sister farted.
A cop pulls over an old man.
The cop walks up to the old man and says, "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
The old man said, "No."
I can't sleep, that's because you're dead.
Three people die on the same day: a German, an American, and an Italian. They all go to Hell for various reasons.
American: "I won't ever see my dog again!"
Italian: "I won't ever make pizzas again!"
German: "Hey, granddad, how have you been?"
Why should you never tell your French doctor that you bite your tongue?
Because your French doctor will give you a tetanus shot.
Why did the octopus cross the road?
'Cause he was on the same side as a sushi restaurant.
You're so fat you're the reason they made tread "meals".
You're so ugly we can't have neighbors.
Richard: Mom, someone called me gay.
Richard's mom: Why didn't you slap him across his face?
Richard: No, I couldn't.
Richard's mom: Why?
Richard: Because he was cute.
"hvhuhdsjcjdsijdskdsivhdsvhsjdvnsjdvdshvgdshgsdhfgh" That's what my friend said when he gave an EpiPen. I don't know why, though.
Why did Stephen Hawking go on to Britain's Got Talent?
To sing.
Why did the depressed person cross the road?
To get run over.
The reason Steven Hawking died is he lost his internet connection.
Why couldn't the toilet paper roll down the road?
For some reason, quarks sound really strange to me.
"Boom, quick; you have five seconds to give me three reasons to live." "1......2......3 .....4....5..." Did you notice you said nothing at all?
Boi, you're the reason the Great Wall of China is a thing. You're so ugly the Chinese needed to block you out!
Why did God invent yeast infections? So women would know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt too.
My mother really hates my dad for some reason. Maybe it was because he cheated on her, or maybe because it was her mom. Either way, it really ruined her birthday.
Why did Tyrone drop his ice cream cone?
A: He got shot.
I came here to laugh.