Nirvana jokes

Me: Cobain!

Friend: No, dude, it's Kobe.

Me: Why? Cobain didn't miss his last shot.

In the words of Kerk Cobane: "Check this sweet no scope!"

What colors were Kurt Cobain's eyes? Blue! One blew right and the other blew up!

Why does Kurt Cobain hate his brother?

Because he's always calling shotgun.

Did you know Kurt had dandruff?

Found his head and shoulders behind the couch.

What does it take to paint a wall red?

Kurt Cobain and his shotgun.

What's bigger than Kurt Cobain's head?

What do you mean? He doesn't have one.

An electrician walks into a green house. He sees a red room. He wonders why it's red because Kurt Cobain and his shotgun were sitting there.

What was the last thing Kurt Cobain said?

"Pop Goes the Weasel."

What's the bad version of "Fuck Nirvana, rape me?"

What has four legs and works at McDonald's?

The remaining members of Nirvana.

During a show, I once asked the crowd if they were pro-guns, and the majority belted out in approval.

I asked a man in the front row why he was pro-guns, and he gave me the basic “personal protection liberty 2nd amendment” hooplah.

Very seriously, I told the crowd, “I’m pro-guns because I enjoy living in a world with only four Nirvana albums.”

My friend was the only one who laughed.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.

I have no father or no milk. Like if you relate.

All the Muslims are pissed off because 24 hours after Chuck Norris went to heaven there were no more virgins left.

Muslims commit suicide to go to Paradise and get 72 virgins... I just go to the local primary school.

What's worse than depression & suicide?

Easy: LIVING. Everyday you wish you were dead but then reality hits you in the face that you're still alive and have to suffer living.

Pretend or not pretend, we have to decide everyday even if we don't pretend no one will notice :) no one ever does :). Living is the problem to everything. We get depression cuz of it and so much. Why can't we just die :)?