Misrepresentation jokes

A blonde girl walks into a gym and sees a guy. The guy takes off his shirt, she says, "Oh, what chest!" "That's 100 lbs of dynamite, baby," he replies. Then he takes off his pants, she says, "Oh, what legs!" He says, "That's 100 lbs of dynamite, baby." After that, he took off his underwear. The blonde girl starts running. He catches her and says, "Why were you running?" She said, "I didn't wanna be in there once I've seen how small the fuse was."

One time this kid came back from school and said, "Mom I have one good news and one bad news, which one do you wanna hear first?" And his mom said, "Good news please," and the boy said, "I got 100% on my math test today." and his mom gave him a hug, and the boy said, "Now to the bad news, I LIED!"

I told my new girlfriend that my mother is deaf.

So she would have to speak loudly and slowly.

I told my mother that my new girlfriend is disabled. Now we wait.

Helen Keller deaf-initely faked it!

My wife told me to pass her lip stick, but I gave her a glue stick. Now she is not talking to me.

A mom gave her son "the talk". Her son replies, "Wait, so there really isn't candy involved? Guess Grandpa lied."