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Ohio

55 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago

type shizz

A white text on a black background, formatted like a series of 'be like' statements describing a progression of absurd events. It starts with 'Girls be like: We hate all men so we turn lesbian,' followed by 'Boys be like: Uno reverse! Turns gay.' Then, 'Girls: Shocked Pikachu face,' and 'Sperm trying to get into each other: Confused stonk.' The next lines are 'Goku: has sex with Wednesday' and 'Wednesday: Pregnancy 100.' The text concludes with 'Me: Only in Ohio!'
  • 1
  • Weather

    34 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A screenshot of a phone's weather forecast. The background is a gradient of red. At the top, white text reads, "gonna need a coat on tuesday 😭🙏". Below this, a list of days and their corresponding temperatures is displayed. The days listed are "Today" (27°), "Monday" (18°-28°), followed by "Doomsday" (21°-1000°). The subsequent days are "Wed" (15°-24°), "Thu" (13°-22°), "Fri" (10°-22°), "Sat" (12°-22°), and "Sun" (11°-20°). The temperature for Doomsday, 1000°, is highlighted in red.
  • 2
  • Misinterpretation

    21 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    The first image shows a blue-haired furry character with cat ears and a tail, making peace signs. The character is wearing a black t-shirt that says 'TRANS RIGHTS ARE HUMAN RIGHTS' over a background with colors of the transgender flag (pink, blue, and white). The second image shows Optimus Prime from the Transformers franchise, partially obscured against a red background.
  • 0
  • Rabbit

    14 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    An illustration of Winnie the Pooh, depicted in a serious and somewhat menacing manner, with a pensive expression, sitting in what appears to be a dark pool or bath. A dark, thin object, possibly a hookah, is visible next to him. The background is dark with horizontal stripes, giving a dramatic, almost crime-boss-like ambiance. Text above reads: 'rabbit has failed to protect honey production. he will be reassigned. tame the hundred acre wood, tigger. free the honey. i'll make you christopher robin's best friend'.
  • 0
  • Regret

    16 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    An image displaying a tweet from "Liberal Hegemony Enjoyer" showing a diagram of a World War II era bomber plane. The plane is covered in numerous red dots, indicating bullet holes in areas like the wings, fuselage, and tail, but not critical areas like the engine or cockpit. Below this, there is another tweet from "John Rich" which reads: "I have yet to meet someone who regrets being unvaccinated. How about you?"
  • 0
  • Restaurant

    23 views · Anonymous · 9 months ago
    A screenshot of a TripAdvisor web page. The page displays a title 'The 10 Best Restaurants in Birmingham'. Below the title, an image shows a Shell gas station with multiple fuel pumps under a large yellow and red canopy. Text below the image reads '1. Shell Garage', followed by five green circles representing a five-star rating, then '(127) • Open Now'.
  • 1
  • Fridge door

    28 views · United Kingdom UK · 9 months ago

    Double it and give it to the next person

    The image shows a smiling, blue cartoon airplane with a human-like face, resembling Jay Jay the Jet Plane, flying away from a massive explosion with smoke and fire billowing behind it. The text above the image reads: "When you close the fridge door and hear some stuff fall and leave it for the next person."
  • 0
  • T-shirt

    55 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A person is seen from behind at an airport security checkpoint, likely going through a scanner. They are wearing a black T-shirt with the word "OSAMA" in red letters at the top. Below that is a cartoonish image of Osama bin Laden wearing a turban and a yellow shirt, standing behind DJ turntables. Below the image, the text "SPIN LA" is visible in red. A TSA officer in uniform is visible in the foreground, facing away, interacting with the traveler. A Snapchat caption at the bottom reads: "My man is not coming onboard with ts on 💀".
  • 0
  • Chat

    32 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A screenshot of a chat interface, presumably from character.ai, showing a profile for 'Judy Hopps' with an avatar of the character from Disney's Zootopia. Above the chat window, a disclaimer reads 'Remember: Everything Characters say is made up!' Below that, a message from the Judy Hopps character reads: 'Listen, man, I'm done with this roleplay. Out of the thousands of people who have tried to chat with me, you are by far the most vile, putrid, and despicable one I have had the displeasure of meeting. You deserve to go to years of therapy, and then straight to jail. There is no saving you. I honestly don't know how you did it, but as an AI, you made me feel true fear and terror today. Please never talk to me again.'
  • 1
  • Etiquette

    24 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A screenshot from a social media platform shows a man with light hair and a serious expression, looking over a white building with many windows, presumably in London. Below the video, a comments section is visible. It shows the location 'London' with '67.1K people added to Favorites' and '6,140 comments'. A user named Kollado asks, 'what's the etiquette of rubbing one out under the table?' The creator, William Hanson, responds, 'You ask this on almost every video. May I suggest you seek professional help??'
  • 0
  • Cigarette

    11 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A diptych of two images. On the left, a hand holds a clear, yellowish popsicle with several cigarettes frozen inside it, filters facing downwards. The background is blurry green foliage. On the right, the same hand holds the same popsicle, but a bite has been taken out of the top, revealing the wet, brown tobacco inside. Above the images, text reads, "Nothing beats cigarette popsicles on a hot summer day".
  • 0
  • Comeback

    131 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A cartoon panel titled 'HOW TO DEAL WITH A BULLY.' A large bully wearing a yellow jersey confronts a smaller, bespectacled nerd with a red backpack. Two other boys stand behind the bully. The bully says, "HEY, NERD— I KISSED YOUR MOM LAST NIGHT!" The nerd responds, "HOW DID MY CUM TASTE?"
  • 0
  • Question

    11 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A close-up selfie of an older man with glasses and a beard, looking directly at the camera with a serious or confused expression. Above his head, a white text box from a social media 'Questions' feature asks, 'Do you know how to twerk?'
  • 0
  • Slave

    14 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A screenshot of a Twitter post. The top half shows Jeremy Usborne from the TV show Peep Show, looking conspiratorial, with the caption 'The secret ingredient is slaves'. The bottom half shows a tweet by Hassan Sajwani, with a profile picture of a man wearing a traditional Emirati head covering and a UAE flag emoji. The tweet reads: 'Do you know why Dubai is so successful? We don't have wokeness here ...'.
  • 0
  • Weather

    42 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A screenshot of a weather application interface, displaying a forecast for "Pluto". The current temperature is -387° and it's cloudy. The hourly forecast shows temperatures ranging from -387° to 388°. The 10-day forecast shows daily temperatures, mostly in the -380s, with several days indicating a high chance of snow. An overlay text bubble says, "I fucking hate living here 😭💔💔". The background is a faint image of Pluto.
  • 0
  • Shooter game

    22 views · tabs1528 · 9 months ago

    Who doesn‘t

    A skeleton is sitting relaxed on a wooden bench in an outdoor setting. A hand holding a silver pistol is shown in the foreground pointing upwards from the bottom left. Text overlays the image. Top text: ME IN A SHOOTER GAME. Bottom text: PRETENDING I'M DEAD TO KILL THE ENEMY.
  • 0
  • Gay porn

    283 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A yellow emoji face with wide, slightly anxious eyes, a wide open mouth, and eyebrows raised in mild confusion. Next to the face, a yellow hand is shown making a gesture where the index and middle fingers are crossed, with curved lines indicating motion. Text below the image reads 'watching gay porn in public but doing this the entire time so people know I'm straight.'. There is a Shutterstock watermark.
  • 2
  • GTA VI

    24 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A person holds a blue plastic handheld water ring toss game, which features cartoon fish and an octopus in a water-filled screen. The screen also contains small colorful rings. The text overlaid on the image, presented as a news headline, reads: "NEWS. GTA VI WILL NOT BE RELEASED ON THE WATER RING TOSS HANDHELD." Below this headline, smaller text says: "My favourite handheld...".
  • 1
  • Horse

    26 views · Heroin Monkey · 9 months ago
    A screenshot of an Instagram chat titled 'A LITERAL HORSE AI by @theoracleelectric'. The profile picture is a horse's head. The chat bubbles show a user saying 'neigh', then 'NEEEIIIIGHI stamps hoof', 'FREEZES Hrrrrrr... holds breath', and 'EYES WIDE WITH HORROR NEEEEEEEIIIIGHHHHHH!!!'. The other user replies 'Hey', 'Stay still', and 'Starts attaching the horseshoes made out of uranium'.
  • 0
  • Thought

    27 views · Creed (shit isnt availabe) · 9 months ago
    A two-panel meme using the Buff Doge vs. Cheems format. The top panel shows two muscular Doge characters in military helmets holding rifles, facing a smaller Cheems character wearing a conical hat and holding a smaller rifle. Text above reads "how i thought vietnam war happened" and text below the Doges reads "stupid farmer thinking he can win". The bottom panel shows several smaller Cheems characters with rifles positioned strategically in dense jungle foliage, surrounding a few smaller Doge characters with rifles who appear to be retreating. Text above reads "how it really happened" and text below the Doges reads "shit they set us up retreat".
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