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ℑ𝔪 𝔚𝔦𝔱𝔥 𝔖𝔱𝔲𝔭𝔦𝔡

Type shit.

A view from the cockpit of a plane aimed at the Twin Towers and the Statue of Liberty in the background.

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a series of three tweets from Donald J. Trump's Twitter account @realDonaldTrump. The first tweet says, 'loli tentacle hentai.' The second is a reply to the first tweet and reads, 'shit this isn't google.' The third tweet, also a reply, says, 'if any of you fucks screenshot this imma nuke a 3rd world country.'

rapboat

66
want to get fucked in the ass
J. COLE "VILLUMINATI"
56
MADE WITH THE GENIUS APP
20
↑ Share
wantabigtiddygothgf. 41m
"If you wanna get fucked in the ass that's between
you and whoever else's dick it is" don't never
fucking disrespect Cole like this trynna take shit out
of context. Gay ass Nigga stupid bitch delete this
fucking shit post
Reply 03

aidencool67

my dad is good

A video still shows a bicycle in the street and the text "Holy shit! Your dad is a good biker." The video is taken at night.

Heroin Monkey

Drakes snake

FR

A man stands next to a barbecue grill with a very large fire, accompanied by the text, "When you know what you're about to say is gonna cause a s*** storm, but you say it anyway."

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a seal with a rainbow in the background and the text "I hope you have a nightmare and shit the bed."

Anonymous

Shitpost-master general

A still from a video shows the text "Harry Potter fans arguing which muggle horcruxed the dumblecunt or some stupid fucking shit."

Heroin Monkey

A man with glasses and a beard looks confused in front of a black background. At the bottom of the image it says: "I don't understand why kids scream when I touch them" Next to it, it says Mikes Meme Menagerie. To the right, is a list of other videos with titles like: "Watch me blow up the world Imao", "7 dead children in my backyard", and "Is he still screaming?".

Thoughtless

A picture of Willy Wonka looking slightly off to the left. Underneath is a text that says "I'm all for human rights and shit, but if you're on a tour in a factory and decide to wander off, it should be legal for the floor workers to hunt you for sport."

RealBoat

r/future
2h
Join
Homie said Future new tape is mid - ended up
fucking his bitch
Discussion
Literally told him not to talk on my goat like that shit
was 8/10 MINIMUM. Asked his girl to meet up, told her
let's get some Mac Donald's, then she gave me head
ion even feel bad Lmaooo
↑ 88
○ 26
☑☑

Heroin Monkey

A man with dark hair wearing a red shirt with a human evolution print, brown pants and dress shoes poses holding a red laptop in his left arm, with his right arm raised and smiling mischievously. The text above the image reads "The mad scientist in his secret laboratory getting ready to press the button that makes a random person in the world shout 'where there's rain, there's bound to be mud!' And then proceed to projectile shit all over the place".

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a definition of "dirty chewbacca" and below a cartoon of Skeletor, saying, "Even I'm not into that shit." The text above says: "When a girl is deepthroating you, you pinch her nipples right as you cum. Her scream paired with the warm liquid and dick in her throat will produce a sound similar to chewbacca's growl."

Heroin Monkey

The image displays a text that says "Boomer ladies: Hahah minion memes. Millennial girls: oh no, Donald Trump racist. 14 y.o girls:". Below there is an image of a girl with superimposed text that reads "SHE SHITS HERSELF".

dabestjoke

When some1 talks shit about you, simply say, "I'm surprised that your teeth aren't brown from all the shit talking you do"

A young woman with long brown hair, wearing a red shirt, gives the middle finger with both hands. The background is white.

kanade otonokoji

Pov: You know when someone is talking shit about me.

A pixelated image of a black haired, white skinned character with red eyes. The character has a stoic expression. The image is on a black background. The text reads "Pov: You know when someone is talking shit about me."

Cahyani Ambara

Barbie

A male Barbie doll is spraying himself with a large bottle of perfume. The text above his head says "libra" and the text next to him says "buying expensive shit they don't need."

Heroin Monkey

1) buy a lobster
[deleted] by
My friend is in forensics and works on crime
scenes. They find a woman laying on the
bathroom floor with a head wound and live
baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
residue. After 3 days of investigation, they
figured out what happened.
Long story short, she bought a lobster from
the market. In the market, they feed the
lobster live baby shrimp until they're sold. This
woman brings the lobster home, inserts the
lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a lighter
and puts the flame towards the lobster's head,
so the lobster will frantically start shaking his
tail (which is inside her vagina), giving her the
jollies. Apparently she killed the lobster from
burning his head too long, the lobster, being
dead, voids his bowels, causing this lobster to
shit live baby shrimp into her vagina. This
woman then goes to pee and sees live baby
shrimp crawling out of her vagina, she freaks
out, falls, and cracks her head open on the
bathtub and dies.
it happened in Chicago in 2001
?
---
14
1) wait for horny
Chicago 2001
"Lobster Love" Incident

Heroin Monkey

A man is looking at his phone. The text says: "Dude, you're drunk, you can barely walk." Yeah no shit, that's why I'm gonna drive home, dumbass.

CrackedRuby_alt

💀

Patrick Star from SpongeBob SquarePants with a big water cooler on his head is the reaction image for the phrase "how I look at bro in the urinal when he says 'when there's rain there's thunder!' and fucking shits himself."

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