Worst Jokes Ever

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Heroin Monkey

A four-panel comic strip. In the first panel, a green frog asks a woman with glasses, "Mom, can you give me money to buy Benadryl?" The woman asks in the second panel, "To help you with your sleep?" The third panel shows a close-up of the frog saying, "Yeeees." The fourth panel shows the frog next to a Benadryl package and the text, "Actually takes 700mg like a boss." The bottom panel shows the frog with dark text that says, "deliriant psychosis time". A dark silhouetted figure is on the right.

Heroin Monkey

A tweet with text "Worst Headline you'll read today and there's like 10 wars happening" above a tweet by @Dexerto saying "The Hawk Tuah Girl is launching her own podcast under Jake Paul's media company". Below are two side-by-side images of Jake Paul looking surprised and the Hawk Tuah Girl smiling.

big [fire] balls

rapboat

The image is a screenshot of a Urban Dictionary entry for Kendrick Lamar, defining him as someone who recently won the beef with Drake. Below, a dialogue shows two friends. The first friend quotes a line from the song, seemingly unable to name an actual song, resulting in the second friend calling the first one a "fake fan".

Heroin Monkey

A Twitter post with a user asking a hypothetical question about getting their penis stuck in a ketchup bottle, followed by two replies.

Heroin Monkey

The meme consists of four panels. In the first panel, Mr. Krabs has a standard appearance and is speaking to Squidward. The text reads, "Look Mr. Squidward! I Paid Plankton to give me Hormonal Treatment!" In the second panel, Mr. Krabs has large breasts and is speaking. The text reads, "Now I don't need to buy food!! I can just live off mi own Milk!!" In the third panel, Mr. Krabs is slurping milk from his own breast. The text reads, "MMMMM MMMM 'Slurrpp' T...Tastes like Crab, Mhmm." In the fourth panel, Squidward looks disgusted.

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a grid of eight panels, each with a close-up of the character Kuzco from the movie "The Emperor's New Groove." In each panel, Kuzco is smiling smugly and the text overlay says "Oh, yeah. It's all coming together.". Above the image the text "Building LEGO be like" is displayed.

Sooploosh MacSchnibble

Two people outside. A person is covered in bees, sitting on a bucket. The other person, dressed in beekeeper gear, is kneeling next to him, holding out a hand.

Sooploosh MacSchnibble

homuratrash:
guy at disney: sir? stitch, a small logic defying blue alien from outer fucking
space, needs a heterosexual romance
disney ceo: okay....but we gotta know she's Female, do u understand?
....she needs long antennae..like long hair..mascara...smooth chest that
sticks out a little more because we need to be reminded that she still got
titties even tho she's a tiny fucking alien
guy at disney: should we make her pink, sir?
disney ceo: ricky you goddamn genius. here are my keys. go to my house
and fuck my wife

Sooploosh MacSchnibble

A large, colorful beach ball, with a man standing next to it. The text below the image reads: "A fun way to ruin a weekend and blow 100 bucks. We took this ball to the beach and after close to 2 hours to pump it up, we pushed it around for about 10 fun filled minutes. That was when the wind picked it up and sent it huddling down the beach at about 40 knots. It destroyed everything in its path. Children screamed in terror at the giant inflatable monster that crushed their sand castles. Grown men were knocked down trying to save their families. The faster we chased it, the faster it rolled. It was like it was mocking us. Eventually, we had to stop running after it because its path of injury and destruction was going to cost us a fortune in legal fees. Rumor has it that it can still be seen stalking innocent families on the Florida panhandle. We lost it in South Carolina, so there is something to be said about its durability."

DaRey1Cray

A video still shows a young man and a young woman, with the text "In 2024 Now We're..." above them and the numbers 22 and 15 below. The right part shows the YouTube comment section with a comment saying "She was better at 12", followed by comments referencing Drake.

Heroin Monkey

A raccoon is lifting a barbell in a home gym. The text on the image says, "This is the ideal male body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like."

Heroin Monkey

An older man with white hair and glasses wearing a red sweater is holding cards and looking down in a classroom. He has a white bag with the text "recycle me" next to him. In the foreground, a paper on a desk reads "Nobody likes you -R". In the background, a few students are sitting at desks.

Anonymous

"Why do you love being a woman?"
@sourpsycho
Women are like bacon. They smell good,
They taste good, and they will kill you slowly

Heroin Monkey

A drawing of a person reading a book to another person in bed. Above the drawing there is a text that reads, "Then the 92nd pig built his house out of depleted uranium and the wolf was like,". Below this text there is a distorted face.

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of two Instagram posts. The first post, from user fatgirlhedonist, says "Idk who needs to hear this, but I switched from buying coffee every day to making it at home 2 years ago and I'm still not a millionaire." The second post, from user brianmstewart, is pinned and replies "I have studied the habits of millionaires. While it is a good step to save money by making coffee at home, have you considered supplementing your income by committing massive fraud?"

The Banana Guy

A white cat with black spots is in focus, staring at the viewer. The text on the image reads: "I HATE WHEN WEBSITES ASK: "ARE YOU A HUMAN?" LIKE NO, I'M A DINOSAUR THAT FORGOT TO DIE 100 MILLION YEARS AGO"

Heroin Monkey

A tweet from President Biden that reads, "Get you a Werewolf Boyfriend who's Fat Balls STINK up the house."

Anonymous

💖💖💖💖💖

The image is a text exchange between a dad and someone else. The dad asks "Are you treating my little princess ok?" The other person replies: "Sir...your little princess has anger issues and throws hands like an inmate. Yes. Things are fantastic."

Heroin Monkey

A close-up image of a husky dog looking directly at the camera with wide eyes and a goofy expression. Behind the dog are three people, two older men and a woman, smiling and looking off-camera. The text overlay reads "This is a golden photobomb. It only appears once every 20,000 memes. Like or have bad luck forever."

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