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Chatbot

10 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 day ago
A split screenshot of a Facebook Messenger conversation with the official Zootopia movie page. On the left, the user Ian says 'hey'. The chatbot, identified as Officer Judy Hopps, asks if he is ready to make the world a better place. Ian replies 'im ready to kill myself'. The chatbot responds 'Great! That's what we're all about here at the ZPD!'. On the right side, the chatbot has sent a long, repetitive string of messages saying 'please don't'.
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  • Situation

    88 views · Willy b · 7 days ago
    A brick apartment building with four windows. Top left: a white curtain. Top right: a rainbow pride flag. Bottom left: a red Soviet flag with a hammer and sickle. Bottom right: a Confederate flag. Text above: "This looks like a very tense living situation." Comment below: "I'm concerned about France in the upper left corner."
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  • United States

    84 views · Anonymous · 10 days ago
    A four-panel comic strip where two men have flags covering their faces. One man has the United States flag and the other has the European Union flag. In the first panel, the US man thinks, "MAN I WISH I WAS MORE LIKE THAT GUY" while looking at the EU man. In the second, the US man walks away thinking, "BUT HE PROBABLY WISHES HE WAS MORE LIKE SOMEBODY ELSE TOO". In the third, the US man looks happy and thinks, "HOLY SHIT I'M GLAD I'M ME". In the final panel, the EU man is walking away in the opposite direction thinking, "I'M ESPECIALLY GLAD I'M NOT THAT GUY".
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  • Dust

    111 views · Willy b · 12 days ago
    A photograph of a woman with dark hair in an updo alongside a humorous, nonsensical obituary for "Brenda Tent." The text describes her retiring from living at the "age of old," being a librarian from birth, married to her high school, and being a literal bird. It ends by stating her funeral will be held in 1977 in heaven and asks for people to send her "more life" instead of flowers.
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  • Nonsense

    146 views · Willy b · 1 month ago
    A headshot of Joe Biden looking confused and disoriented. To his left, text in white on a black background reads: "Goats are like mushrooms. Because if you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters." - Joe Biden. Small watermarks at the bottom right mention @mekkah.rolls and a TikTok comment.
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    Charlie Kirk

    115 views · Anonymous · 1 month ago
    A screenshot of a YouTube interface with a video playing at the top showing a young man with curly brown hair and a mustache wearing a grey hoodie. Below the video, a comment by user @verderain reads: "This nga look like charlie kirks aryan brother."
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  • Debt

    44 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 month ago
    A four-panel black and white comic strip. Panel 1: A small girl stands outside a building labeled 'BANK' with a sign that says 'VISIT OUR LOAN DEPT.'. Panel 2: The girl is inside, speaking to a male banker with a mustache at a desk. She says, 'I'D LIKE TO BORROW TWO DOLLARS.' The banker asks, 'WHAT FOR?'. Panel 3: The girl replies, 'THE CIRCUS IS IN TOWN.' The banker responds, 'IT IS?'. Panel 4: An adult version of the girl is lying in bed, looking distraught. An adult man stands over her with a concerned expression. In the background, above the bed, a thought bubble shows the child version of the girl and the banker happily eating ice cream at the circus, surrounded by other smiling children.
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  • Ladder

    106 views · Gummy gummy gummy bear · 1 month ago
    A screenshot of a text conversation on a black background. At the top, white text says "Nothing like a classic text from the old man". The messages below show a gray bubble saying "I fell off a 50 foot ladder this morning". A purple bubble response says "OMG dad are you ok !!!". Two final gray bubbles from the sender say "Yes" and "Thankfully I was on the first step".
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  • Capybara

    323 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 months ago
    An image featuring a photo of a capybara at the top and a series of Instagram comments below. The comments mock the animal's generic appearance, comparing it to a default video game character, common loot, or a tutorial enemy. Text includes: "Imagine being a random fucking thing", "bro is an enemy in the tutorial", "bro is the default animal", "Bro is built like common loot", "Just some bullshit with fur", "Ts is a damn login reward", "His only job is existing and that's enough", and "Went to the pet store and just said 'one animal please'".
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  • Recognition

    48 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 months ago
    A screenshot of a Tumblr thread. The top post by 'gen-z-culture-is' shows a close-up of the movie version of Sonic the Hedgehog with text below it stating, "According To A Survey, Gen Z Is More Likely To Recognise Sonic The Hedgehog Than Shakespeare". A reply by 'justlgbtthings' says, "well yeah how is shakespeare gonna recognize a blue hedgehog when he's dead".
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  • Focus

    34 views · Shitpost master-general · 2 months ago
    An image of basketball star LeBron James looking extremely focused and intense, surrounded by digital flames and sparks. He is holding a basketball. Overlaid text says: "POV: when the choir hit a high note and the glass dildo breaks in my a$$ so I gotta lock in and pretend like nothing happened".
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  • Tail

    34 views · Shitpost master-general · 2 months ago
    A screenshot of a Reddit post from the subreddit r/playboicarti. The post is titled "I think everyone wishes humans had tails". The body of the post describes a hypothetical scenario at Walmart where a mom compliments someone's hair. The author suggests that if humans had tails, they would wag involuntarily, revealing excitement and causing embarrassment when the 'mom' notices.
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  • 9/11

    75 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 months ago
    A screenshot of a tweet from an account named Simon (@realsast). The tweet text says, "im so stupid i only now realized its called 9/11 because the two towers look like the number 11". The profile picture is a simple yellow face with a slight smile on a black background.
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  • Hello Kitty

    216 views · Heroin Monkey · 3 months ago
    A blurry, low-resolution image of the character Squidward Tentacles from the show SpongeBob SquarePants, screaming and pointing his finger aggressively towards the right. Above the image is a text block from a social media platform stating: "HELLO KITTY DOES NOT LIKE SELF HARM OR TAKING XANAX. SHE ENJOYS BAKING COOKIES WITH HER FRIENDS".
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  • Instagram

    49 views · Heroin Monkey · 3 months ago
    A pixelated text post on a gradient purple background. The text expresses extreme anger and frustration, reading: "What the fuck is up with people thinking they can just post images off their Instagram. [Three blushing/hot face emojis] Like bro we don't give a fuck. [Two green square emojis] Keep your images of your family and friends off my fucking feed [Three hot face/blushing emojis]. Dumb bitch! [Sparkle emoji] [Red heart emoji]".
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  • Concept

    103 views · Shitpost master-general · 3 months ago

    Soles

    A four-panel comic strip. In the first three panels, a woman and a man are hanging Christmas stockings over a fireplace. The woman questions the tradition, saying, "Stockings are kind of a weird concept. Like, who came up with it? Who thought pulling things out of socks would be so exciting?" In the fourth panel, Santa Claus is sitting at a desk, looking intently at a laptop screen which displays a grid of photos/video feeds showing various close-ups of bare feet. Santa says, "Hell yeah."
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  • Man

    74 views · Shitpost master-general · 3 months ago
    A parody illustration of the "Think Mark" meme from the animated series Invincible. It features Diogenes, depicted as a muscular man with a white beard in a white toga, kneeling over a beaten Plato. Diogenes is holding a plucked, pink chicken in one hand and pointing at his head with the other, shouting at Plato. The background features ancient Greek columns under a dusk sky. The text above them reads: "You can't just define man as 'featherless bipeds'! I mean look at this chicken I just plucked! Does this featherless biped look like a man to you?! THINK PLATO THINK!"
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  • War

    53 views · Shitpost master-general · 3 months ago
    A four-panel rage comic. Panel 1 shows a simple stick figure arguing about WWII being 'based' to a Trollface who replies, 'you still think there was a war?'. Panel 2 features a screaming, wide-mouthed Trollface delivering a rant about Babylon, unreal wars, and genocide. Panel 3 shows a menacing, detailed Trollface asking conspiratorial questions about merchants, crosses, scientists, and disposing of bodies. Panel 4 features a highly distorted, demonic black Trollface head surrounded by a colorful Ouroboros (a dragon biting its tail), with the text: 'THE HEAD BITES THE TAIL, IN DEATH THEY ARE BORN.'
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  • Plush

    120 views · Heroin Monkey · 4 months ago
    A photo shows a grey F-35 fighter jet plush toy sitting on a white surface. Text overlay says "Buy f-35 plush". Below the image is a screenshot of a TikTok comment section showing a single comment from a user: "Does it have hole on the rear? like engine?"
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    Antisemitism

    255 views · Based_Noticer · 4 months ago
    A screenshot of a Twitter post with white text on a black background. The text reads: 'No one baselessly starts blaming Jews for everything. It actually goes like this: "I hate the media" "Wait there's a bunch of Jews behind this?" "I hate the porn industry" "Wait there's a bunch of Jews behind this?" "I hate our foreign policy" "Wait there's a bunch of Jews behind this?" "I hate Wall Street" "Wait there's a bunch of Jews behind this?" "I hate academia" "Wait there's a bunch of Jews behind this?" "I hate Israel blowing up kids" "Wait there's a bunch of Jews behind this?" That's the actual sequence of events.'
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