Worst Jokes Ever

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Happening Memes

big [fire] balls

Two images show a conversation. In the top image, a man asks a priest, "What happens after you die?" In the bottom image, the priest responds, "Lots of things happen after you die - they just don't involve you."

rapboat

Text: THEORY: My father leaving me is a Drake diss. Reason 1: My father left without saying a word or giving a reason, a reference to how Drake sneak disses people with no direct confrontation. Reason 2: My father is a big Rihanna fan, we all know what happened between Rihanna and Drake...

Sooploosh MacSchnibble

The image shows a split view of John F. Kennedy. On the left a black-and-white photo inside a red circle shows Kennedy riding in a car during a parade, on the right a color portrait of Kennedy smiling. Below, the text "You'll never believe what happened at this parade (it blew my mind)" is shown. A YouTube interface is at the bottom with the channel name "JFK".

Anonymous

A raccoon is looking at the camera with the text "Sorry for being annoying. It absolutely will happen again."

Anonymous

The meme shows a conversation where a father confronts someone for taking his daughter's virginity. The person apologizes and then the image says "Virginity restored."

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a tweet from NATO that says "@NATO blocked you. You are blocked from following @NATO and viewing @NATO's Tweets". The text above the screenshot reads "Me, hungover: I don't remember what happened last night. Last night:".

Anonymous

A screenshot of a messaging conversation. The first message reads, "This is Gavin mom. I am sorry to inform you." The next message reads, "What happens?" The final message reads, "He killed himself." Below this is the word, "wompwomp."

Jazzy💕

A woman is crying while holding a telephone receiver to her ear. The text above the image says, "Me calling my best friend when the smallest inconvenient thing happens to me."

rapboat

The image shows a screenshot of YouTube's trending videos. The top five videos are about Drake, Kendrick Lamar and general relativity. The videos titles include: 'THE BOOGEYMAN CAME OUT TO PLAY! | Kendrick Lamar - Euphoria (Drake diss) (REACTION!!!)', 'How Drake Was In The Studio Listening To The Kendrick Diss', 'KENDRICK LAMAR RESPONDS TO DRAKE & J COLE!!! "Euphoria" (REACTION)', 'Something Strange Happens When You Follow Einstein's Math', and 'KENDRICK LAMAR HAS RECLAIMED HIS THRONE FROM DRAKE | KENDRICK LAMAR - EUPHORIA (DRAKE DISS)'.

MEME LORD

A yellow Labrador is sitting in the backseat of a car, looking directly into the camera with a slightly concerned expression. The text above the dog reads: "How my dog stares at me after I murmur 'Bad things happen to good people' with my shlong in my hand."

MEME LORD

The image shows a split screen. At the top left, there is an image of the cartoon characters Tom and Angela hugging. Below them, there are two cats, one white and one black, eating from a bowl on the floor. Above them, the text reads "freaky ahh cat" with emojis and below the cats there is the text "What happened to talking Tom and Angela?" with emojis.

Anonymous

Happens any time I'm sick or would be lyingg in bed all day for any reason

A spotted dog is nestled in a bed, looking very comfortable.

Anonymous

My friend is has the best ideas

A screenshot of a discord conversation. Windy says that hopefully a bad situation wont happen, and the two friends might work it out. Seth replies with 'Eh'. Windy then says if the situation happens too much, to just put the persons parents in a retirement home. Seth replies with 'Lmao'.

The Unknown King of Moderation

ITS HAPPENING

A person is standing in front of a monitor with a loading screen on it and appears to be frustrated.

Heroin Monkey

A dark horse wearing a hat is inside a bar. The text above says "You're never gonna believe what just happened" and the response is "Tell me". The text below says "horse in the bar".

𝓗𝓪𝓲𝓵𝓮𝔂𝔂

The image shows two panels. The left panel depicts a person lying in a hospital bed with tubes in his nose. The text above him reads: "When your boss asks for proof you're in hospital." The right panel shows the character Baby Yoda. Above him the text reads: "Boss: You should've been here at 8. Me: Why, what happened at 8?"

shaylie lol

Two images of Sully, the blue monster from Monsters, Inc., are shown side-by-side. The first image shows Sully with a slightly strained expression, while the second image shows him with a more focused look. The text reads: "When you're about to sneeze but you gotta concentrate to make it happen."

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a puppet of Ernie looking angry holding a long thin object. Below him another puppet, Bert, looks terrified. There is text below the puppets: "This is what happens to snitches!" Ernie suddenly shouted. The last thing Bert ever saw was his own blood spraying across the mirror.

Eltheariesisunstoppable

A brown dog looking shocked at a phone in its human hand. Above the dog it reads: "Me learning what's happening in the world through memes because I don't watch the news anymore."

Heroin Monkey

1) buy a lobster
[deleted] by
My friend is in forensics and works on crime
scenes. They find a woman laying on the
bathroom floor with a head wound and live
baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
residue. After 3 days of investigation, they
figured out what happened.
Long story short, she bought a lobster from
the market. In the market, they feed the
lobster live baby shrimp until they're sold. This
woman brings the lobster home, inserts the
lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a lighter
and puts the flame towards the lobster's head,
so the lobster will frantically start shaking his
tail (which is inside her vagina), giving her the
jollies. Apparently she killed the lobster from
burning his head too long, the lobster, being
dead, voids his bowels, causing this lobster to
shit live baby shrimp into her vagina. This
woman then goes to pee and sees live baby
shrimp crawling out of her vagina, she freaks
out, falls, and cracks her head open on the
bathtub and dies.
it happened in Chicago in 2001
?
---
14
1) wait for horny
Chicago 2001
"Lobster Love" Incident

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