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Body

11 months ago
A screenshot of a tweet that says "What was I cooking last night" above an image of a note in iCloud that says "Gay last supper". The note contains the following three lines: "John: omg ur body is tea", "Peter: we are eatinggggg" and "Judas: i am going to kill Jesus".
  • 0
  • Driver

    1 year ago
    A screenshot of a Twitter post by user @smilingnodding. The post text reads: "Lyft driver is going double the speed limit, has a check engine light on, and is blasting Slipknot. I immediately took the wheel, crashed the car, and burned it down along with the Slipknot CD. #deathtoallposers"
  • 0
  • Jokes

    Minefield

    7 years ago

    Where did Suzy go after getting lost on a minefield?

    "Everywhere."

  • 26
  • Funeral

    7 years ago

    "I hate going to weddings, because the old lady next to you always whispers in your ear, 'You're next.' So I started doing the same to them at funerals, 'You're next.'"

  • 22
  • Cop

    7 years ago

    I wasn't planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.

  • 31
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