How many time does it take to cook a baby in a microwave?
I don’t know, I can’t count while masturbating
What’s the difference between an egg and a wank?
You can beat an egg
q:what did the sign say on the whore house a:beat it where closed
So I caught my girlfriend masturbating with a carrot. My first reaction was “Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it’s gonna taste like carrots!”
Why can't Jordan moan?
Because his parents are in the room next to him. Asleep.
What's the difference between a gun and my will to live? None, they are both absent.
What do lezbians do when they have a problem, they finger it out.
A Drunk Guy Asked His Penis : 《Tell Me, How Can You Get Shorter And Longer And I Can't ? 》
《Why Don't You Speak To Me ?》
《Stop Getting Shorter And Longer Or I Will Choke You》
《Oh Yeah I Like It ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 》
Hhhhhhhhh ♪(┌・。・)┌
Rose are red, give me some limes, boy dies after masturbating 42 times
Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand? A: So she can moan with the other.
What do you call it when you get away with masturbating in the shower? You got off clean
https://soundcloud.com/alex-hill-643211961/kangaroo-max-by-ahillzzz-feat-lil-burg/reposts
Ex girlfriend “i can smell fish” Ex boyfriend “i can smell shit” Ex boyfriend “ well how many boys swam down there” Ex girlfriend “20!” Fish “ wasn’t mean I don’t swim around mistakes”
why was the T-rex so angry?You would be angry too,if you’re arms were to short to masterbaute.
The first priest asks the second, "How long do we keep the babies in the holy water?", the priest replies, "No clue... I close my eyes when I masturbate"
Walking's a chore, let alone crawling
Steven hawking was going to jerk off nope😂
Boy goes to Confession Boy " What are you doing father" Priest "Its called masturbation and soon you will be doing it" Boy " Why do you say that father" Priest " Cause my hand is getting tired"
what did the mans dick say to the man
i just cant "hand"le it
Why Did The Van Cross The Road? To Get To The School For The Little Kids
