When the teacher calls on you and asks you how many people did Hitler kill?
"One, he killed himself."
Why did the goat have an abortion?
Because she already had too many kids!
Wow, why so many of the same joke?
Why can't you play poker in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs!
A man found out that he was going to die.
A German doctor comes in and says "you have 10 more". The man yells out "10 WHAT!! DAYS!!!! WEEKS!!!". And the doctor says "No seconds". And the man says "9 SECONDS!!!" And the doctor says "Nein. Ten seconds". He asked "How many seconds do I have to live 10, 9 , or...?"
Then he died and learned how to say no in German....
How many people do you think are in a graveyard? Hopefully none.
How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? 10, 1 to change the lightbulb, 9 to talk about how inspired they are?
How many mice dose it take to *screw* in a light bulb 2 ;)
Ex-girlfriend: "I can smell fish."
Ex-boyfriend: "I can smell shit."
Ex-boyfriend: "Well, how many boys swam down there?"
Ex-girlfriend: "20!"
Fish: "It wasn't me. I don't swim around mistakes."
How many genders are there?
One, women are property.
You know how many people said, "This ship will never sink?"
They jinxed it by saying "never sink."
How many people does it take to change a lightbulb underwater? The results are shocking!
The other day I pushed a Chinese woman off the Golden Gate Bridge. I was Wong on so many levels.
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's a silly question. Feminists can't change anything.
I’m giving in my two week resignation to life... it’s not you ... it’s me!!!
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Infinite because feminists can't solve problems.
How many thumbs down can this joke get?
Joke: Runescape, mustard, tits, Pamela Anderson.
How many gay guys can you fit on a barstool? 4... if you turn it upside down.
Q: How many dogs does it take to shingle a roof? A: It depends on how you cut 'em.
