Today, a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.
What do you get when you cross a panhandler and a politician and a lobbyist and a prostitute and a sodomite a Jehovah's Witness knocking on your door at your house to convert you to their religion
I knocked on Stephen Hawkins door but nobody answered...
All I got was "error 404 page not found"
When the school shooter knocks on the classroom door and the autistic kid opens it
Paddy and Seamus work at the Guinness factory and Seamus has a horrible accident and dies at work. Paddy agrees to tell Seamus` wife the bad news. He knocks on the door and Seamus` wife answers. " Whats happened Paddy?" Paddy frowns. " Im sorry to say poor Seamus fell into the Guinness vat and drowned, im so sorry." She started to cry and asked paddy: " Did he at least die quickly?" Seamus shook his head, " No, he got out 3 times for a pee."
A policeman just knocked on my door and told me my dogs are chasing people on bikes. That’s ridiculous! My dogs don’t even own bikes!
Went to see a psychic the other day. I knocked on the door and she said 'who is it?' So I turned around and left.
A man is at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. A few years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: ‘What the hell was that all about?
The next time I knock on your door I'll hit you instead of the door
a kid is trick - or - treating. he knocks on a door. then someone opens the door and the kid said, "HI I'M THE WICKED WIENER!"!!!🌭😺😸😹😆😅😂🤣😄
When I hired a asian detective to see if my wife was cheating on me, I got this letter:
Mr. Wong- I see he so I climb up tree, he knock on door and she let in he, she talks to he, he talks to she, he undress she, she undress he, she play with he, he play with she, I play with me, I fall out tree, I no see..... No fee.
*Knock knock*
Why are you knocking on a wall, you're in the Twin Towers and they're going down
johnny was watching TV when you hear them say bitch and bastards so he ask hes dad "what is a bitch and bastard." dad say "a bitch is a female and a bastard is a mail." then johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say ass and shit so he ask hes dad what shit and ass means dad says "a shit is shaving creme like what i'm putting on my face and ass is a coat why don't you bug your mom." so johnny goes back to the TV and then they say fuck so johnny ask his mom what fuck means mom says "fuck means carving like doing to the turkey then a few minutes later Johnny hears a knock on the door so he answers it he then says "welcome bitch and bastard may i tack your ass" the people then ask wear hes parents are johnny says "my dad is putting shit on hes face and my mom i fucking the turkey.
Spock went to the enterprises toilet and he knocked on it "Kirk are you in there?" Spiked asked, Kirk answered "hold on i am making a captains log"
A man sacrificed children who played Roblox so when someone knocked on the door, they said "An administrator has banned you from heaven"
a man had 10 dead and blooduy babys in middle of his livingroom. The police suddenly knocked on his door. What is the hardest to hide?
-boner.
#babyjokes
Why should you always knock on the fridge door before opening it?
The salad could be dressing!
Susie was in her mother's room one night. As her mother was getting ready for bed. She had slipped off her blouse, her boobs plum and perky. Susie had asked what are those and will i get them? Her mother had said they were boobs and she would grow some in a few year's. Her mother told susie to find her father and say goodnight. So susie left, headed down the hall to the bathroom where her father was showering . Susie knocked on the door, he said come in. He had moved the shower curtain over just a bit. Susie said she loved him, and then seen her father's dick. Shocked, susie asked her father what that was and if she would get one. Her father said it was a dick, he said susie would get it after her mother went to bed .
Yo mama's so poor I knocked on her front door of her house and realised I was already outside her backyard!
An LDS preacher knocks on the door with a chalice of wine offering to do the sacrement
The person living there points and says, "begone fowl blood-drinker"
And promptly the preacher bursts into flames leaving nothing but ash.
