How do homeless people punish their children?
What are their children going to do? Go to their room?
Howe Jokes
How did the burglar get into my house?
Intruder window.
How sad and pathetic is it that all you wait for after you finish a suicidal joke is for people to like your joke, but you know you'll just be a failure at that as well?
How do you fix a broken gorilla?
With a monkey wrench.
How did the retard get hurt raking the leaves?
Fell out of the tree.
How are Kobe’s death and people in 9/11 the same? They both hit the ground really hard.
How do emos compliment each other?
They say, "I like your cuts g."
I bought a ceiling fan the other day.
It was a complete waste of money.
He just stands there applauding and saying, "Ooh, I love how smooth it is."
How does a non-binary ninja kill someone?
They slash them.
Why do orphans hate Dom Toretto?
Because they hate how he cares about family.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know how to hit a home run.
A man and a boy went into a forest. The boy said he was scared. The man said, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone."
Q: How do you know there’s a party at Neverland Ranch? A: All the Big Wheels are parked out front.
Q: When do you know it’s over? A: Only one is left.
How old do you have to be to drink? Any age.
Couldn't believe how much of a bad mood my work mate was in this morning. So I decided to ask him what was the matter and if everything was OK with his wife, Flo.
He then broke down crying and said when he got home the night before, he caught his wife in bed with the plumber. I tried to console him as best as I could, but he just couldn't get over flow.
Q: How did Helen Keller get a concussion?
A: She kept stepping on a rake.
How do you think the unthinkable? With an iceberg.
Sorry, I don't have a joke here... Just wondering how idiots end up here complaining about offensive jokes when you ended up here. You had to click that section on purpose, right? If you can't take it, piss the fuck off... If I'd be gay and I'd look up gay jokes and get offended... how stupid is that?
Me: Dad, my phone is broken.
Dad: How?
Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.
Dad: Stupid.
How do you fit 3 gay guys on a barstool? Flip it upside down.
