How do orphan jokes start?
Checking your shoulder.
How do Chinese people name their kids?
They throw them down the stairs and see what noise they make! WA WA WAAAAAAAAAAAA
A policeman found a dead body of a man on the street. He thought he recognized the body and the 2 friends he usually hung out with, so he called in one of the friends.
The friend looked into the dead body's face and said, "Yep, that's definitely Joe," but then, to be absolutely sure, he turned the body over, pulled down the back of his pants, and said, "Oh no, wait, that's not Joe." The policeman called in the 2nd friend. The 2nd friend looked into the dead body's face and said, "Yep, that's definitely Joe," but then, to be absolutely sure, he turned the body over, pulled down the back of his pants, and said, "Oh no, wait, that's not Joe." Confused, the policeman asked, "How is it that when you look into his face you're sure he is your friend, but when you look at his ass you're sure he is not?"
The 1st friend said, "Well, you see, Joe has 2 assholes." "Are you serious?" the policeman asked. "Oh yes," he replied, "we've never actually seen them, but when the 3 of us hang out together people point and say, 'Hey, there's Joe with those 2 assholes.'"
If I have ligma and you have ligma, how abt you ligma balls 😏 (it’s all abt how you pronounce the end)
You know how sometimes you want to listen to music?
But everything you listen to is just supremely unsatisfying, even if it's songs you usually love; they are just so unappealing, and you have no idea what you actually want to listen to.
Q. How many cops does it take to Put in a light bulb.A. Non they just beet the room for being black. 😂😂😂
How do you make an emo jump?
A cliff.
Hello everyone! I just came back! How are things going?
How do you get an orphan sad?
You say you will tell their mom that they have been a baaaaaad boy.
My friend asked me why I know how to tie a noose.
I told them, "because I’m such a noose-ance."
How do Chinese parents name their children?
Dropping a pan down the stairs. Bing, Bong, Dong.
How do you give a redneck a circumcision? Kick his sister in the jaw.
How do I get out of the toilet seat? Help me, please. I'm very stuck!
How do you make an orphan shut up
You tell his mom
How do pirates like their movies?
You already know the answer, don't you?
Well...
ARRR rated! Huh huh huh...
Life is like a game of chess.
I don’t know how to play chess.
How cool is NASA?
Not cool at all.
How many baby's does it take to cover a brick wall?
Depends on how hard you throw it😆😂😁.
A woman has been raped by a man. She calls the police, and a policeman shows up.
Woman: "Please help, officer! I have been raped!"
Officer: "No problem, ma'am, I will just unrape you."
Woman: "What? Unrape me? How?"
Officer proceeds to bring back the rapist and forces the woman to rape the rapist back in order to cancel out the initial rape.
So, my son is into astronomy, and he asked how stars die. I said, "Usually overdose."
