HI jokes

I gave my friend some paper. It cut his wrists.

I know everything about Walt Disney! How he died, how his mom and dad died, how his kids died, when he was born, where he was born, and how he was born. 😏

Me and my friend are walking, we see a kid. My friend asks him why he's crying and if he lost his parents. He said, "Yeah." I slapped my friend because we were at an orphanage.

I would like to die like my Islamic father, in his sleep, but not like the rest of the people in the plane or those in those identical towers.

What does an emo kid say to his best friend?

"Let's hang out."

I just watched a documentary about Adolf Hitler.

He sure was a popular guy. Everywhere he went, people shouted “Hi Hitler” and gave him a little wave.

I kinda feel sorry for Hitler.

Looking back at some old photos of him, his friends always left him hanging when he went for a high-five.

Hi, I'm cool.

I walked into an orphanage and a kid was crying. I asked him what was wrong and he said some kids were bullying him. I told him to go tell his parents.

Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, “I want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.”

Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. “Mein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?”

Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. “You see, no one cares about the Jews.”

My dad just found out and told my mom about one of their friends, Chad, who just murdered his wife, Claire. After doing that, he turned the gun on himself and committed suicide right after.

My mom's reply: "Jesus, Chad will do anything to get out of cleaning his mess, won't he?"

How do you surprise a 50-year-old man? By putting a 12-inch dick through his ass.

He said, "Best surprise ever!"

Steve Kerr really named his son Nick.

Why did the bullet end up losing his job?

Because he got fired!

Why did the orphan get an iPhone 14 for his birthday? Because it has no home button.

I pushed a handicapped orphan out of his wheelchair. Who is he gonna tell, his parents?

What did Osama Bin Laden's kids not inherit after his death?

His hide-and-seek skills.

What was Hitler known for?

His exceptional cost efficiency.

Q: What did the Buffalo say to his son when he left for college?

A: Bison.

Why does Johnny Sins cover his pants, but it doesn't work?

Because the long, hard thing can't chirp down.

Tell it to your parents and friends!