Hes jokes
Chuck Norris is so immortal, even he killed Death.
Why couldn't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he had no BODY to go with.
A guy bought an AMG and crashed it. Now he knows how the Mercedes bends.
Zozo the hobo is single like a Pringle.
Single like a Pringle, and he loves Pringle's, get it?
Why would a dead guy lie?
Because he can't stand up.
Memes
If a wizard gets robbed by a muggle, has he been muggled?
What noise did Steven Hawking make when he died?
Windows shutting down.
Q: What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of Helium?
A: HeHe.
What did the man say when he swallowed a clock and tried to go to the bathroom?
WATCH OUT!!!
Your mama so fat, when Pennywise said, "We all float down here," he saw her and suddenly knew he was mistaken.
Has anybody heard of the guy who passed out in the middle of oncoming traffic? Yeah, he was tired.
What's in a man's mouth when he realizes he's gay?
A dick.
Why did the chicken cross the road to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
Yo dad's so stupid, he came back after he got the milk.
Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"
I saw a kid on the curb while I was on a walk, and he was in baggy clothes, and I said, "Are you an orphan?" He said, "Yeah." And the orphan said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Ur parents."
My BFF asked me: "You know why it took Carlos 3 days to move on?"
I said: "Why?"
My BFF says: "Well, it's because he was already cheating!"
I said: "KNEW IT!"
A kid went and got a haircut. The day after, he went to school, and a friend says, "I like your cut." He replies, "Which one?"
The real dead hooker joke is on all of us from the Fraser Valley in BC. You know damn well each and everyone of us ate that Pickton hooker pork. Considering it stretching from the 80's-2000's, pretty sure he got 4 generations of Valley folk with that Pickton pork.
I went to school with a gay guy who was really smart, but he always got mad that he got straight A's instead of getting all the D's.