Friend 4 jokes

Friend 1: What's your favorite drink or food?

Friend 2: Pizza.

Friend 3: Donuts.

Friend 4: I don't eat food but I do drink bleach.

Friend 1: (calling the suicide hotline)

Friend 2: (Calling the parents)

Two friends fighting.

Friend 3: "Cut it out, you two!"

Friend 4: "It wouldn't help if they cut it out... Believe me... I've tried..."

My friend's 4-year-old daughter made up this joke.

What kind of poo should you put in your hair?

Shampoo.

Screw sister from a mister or brother from another mother. We besties from another testie.

Friends are like penguins.

If you stab a penguin, they die.

I lost my black friend in the shadows. I lost my white friend on the wall. I lost my Asian friend in the sand and I lost my Islamic friend in the bombings.

Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.

Like if your best friend is emo.