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I told my friend you should definitely quit smoking, but he could not find me because he was already up in flames.

A man is digging in his garden and finds a gold chest. He goes to tell his wife.

Then he remembers why he was digging in the garden...

I awoke after being raped and was shocked to find my fingers were broken. It was hard to grasp.

Bro, my forehead is so big whenever I need to find something on it, I need the exact coordinates.

I walked into an orphanage and asked a kid why they were crying.

They said: "Because I lost my parents."

I said: "Let's find them."

They cried harder, so I walked out of the orphanage.

Two people are in a restaurant. Person #1 doesn’t order anything, and Person #2 orders a chili.

Person #1: “Aren’t you gonna eat your bowl of chili?”

Person #2: “No, you can have it.”

Person #1: “Ok, thanks...”

Person 1 starts eating his food only to find half of a dead rat! He vomits all of the food back into the bowl.

Person #2: “That’s about as far as I got too!”

You're so skinny that your mom had to use a whole shampoo bottle on your head, but she still couldn’t find you.

When an orphan takes a photo, it’s also a family portrait!

Btw, if people find these offensive, why are you here? Why are you searching orphan jokes anyway?

I’m not saying you’re going bald, but you’ll find Waldo before you find your hairline.

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  • As a fellow emo, I find these very rude and disrespectful. Please take off, or I'll tell Mom.

    Also, if anyone knows any high bridges nearby, please tell me (I'm asking for a friend).

    P.S. I have no friends.

    Me: *finds out my dad's an orphan*

    No one:

    Literally no one:

    Me: Time to make his life hell.😈