Elastic jokes

How is having fun with a prostitute like bungee jumping?

You’re dead if the rubber breaks.

Balls are annoying. They just bounce and never keep still.

You look at it. You tug on it like a shoe string. You play with it like elastic bubble plastic, but it still never grows.

What do you call an elite bungee jumper? An emo kid.

Why'd the rubber go flying across the room?

Because it got pissed off!

I did a bungee jump for charity recently. It was called "spastics on elastics."

I decided to make a charity bungee jump for the local disabled. It's called "Spastics on Elastics."

What do you use to strap an eagle's nest together?

An eagle-lastic band!

A condom and bungee jumping are exactly alike, if the rubber breaks, you're f**ked.

I'm not going to bungee jump. I was born because of broken rubber and I'm not gonna die the same way.

I'm doing a charity bungee jump for the local disabled.

It's called "spastics on elastics."