Conceit jokes

I hate Russian dolls. They're so full of themselves.

Like if you know someone is emo.

What does it mean when a man has a dodgy past? It means he has skeletons in his closet.

What does it mean when a man likes Lana Del Rey better than Ed Sheeran? It means he has a closet full of women's leather pants (but no women in their dating history).

I wish my grass was emo, then it would cut itself.

What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common?

They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.

I am glass! People see right through me.