Canning jokes

My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets."

If you're reading this, then good, let's stop this hating on this site! We can just get along, or if not, then don't say anything at all! "Kiss."

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose πŸ‘ƒ, but you can't pick your friends' noses πŸ‘ƒ πŸ‘ƒ πŸ‘ƒ.

I called the suicide hotline in Iraq. The person got excited and asked if I can drive a truck.

Okay, I'm so sorry, Alya, and Drew. I didn't mean to say that you guys were stupid and cringy. I mistyped. Can you guys forgive me by any chance? I'm so sorry :(

What's something a depressed person can do that a regular person can't?

The depressed person can scan themself.

Can you make me a bowl of cereal? Oh wait, your dad never came back with the milk.

As an American, I like cars. And like all car enthusiasts, even just a little scratch can ruin a brand new car.

So why is it that we go to different countries like India and see that almost every car is completely totaled? I guess we have different meanings of "it's just a scratch."

You know somebody has a fat ass when someone is standing between you and them, and all you can focus on is that trunk.

😳 😳 😳 what can a physically handicapped β™Ώ πŸ‘¬ πŸ‘¨ πŸ‘¨ gay man can do better than a physically handicapped β™Ώ bisexual man πŸ‘¨ πŸ‘© πŸ‘¨ πŸ€” when his πŸ‘„ mouth is wide open 😍 when his head is sticking out under the stall inside the men's 🚹 restroom 🚻 at a rest 😴 area 😴 suck the chrome of a tall pipe πŸ‘„