Bum jokes
One day a local pastor was visiting the home of some parishioners who had a teenage son. The parents were worried about what career their son would choose, so the pastor said he had a simple test that could predict what would become of him.
He would put three objects on a table and let the young man choose whichever one he wanted to have: a Bible, a wallet, and a bottle of scotch. If the boy chose the Bible, he would probably become a priest; if he chose the wallet, he'd be a banker; and if he chose the bottle, he'd become a worthless bum.
So the parents called their son into the room, and the pastor told him he could have whichever object he wished. When the boy promptly picked up all three, the pastor cried out, "Heaven forbid! He's going to be a Jesuit!"
What's a booty's favorite dance move?
THE BUM BOUNCE!
What does Mammot like on a woman’s body?
Bum bum bummmm buuummmmm bummm.
Stinking poo poo bum.
Joke of the day: Your mum is so fat I saw her at Greg’s! 😭🤣
As a woman, why is your stomach bigger than your bums? 😒
You look nice, and you seem like good fun, so if I give you this flower, will you finger my bum?
What did the poo say when it fell out of your bum?
"Your anus looks like my mum's bedsheet which is smelly and covered in poo."
I also just wanted to add that a Goonie's anus looks like my nan's mouth.
Do you know Bumo?
Bumo deez nuts.
Princess Peach is a BUM!
What did the constipated bum say to the other bum?
Piss don't s**t on me!
I like penis in my bum!
What did one chair say to the other?
"I'm so bummed out!"
Get the gun, shoot it up your bum!
My bum hurts.
"Fuck off for I killed him, bum bum."
Willy bum.
Why did Stephen Hawking die? Because he got bummed too hard in the shower.
My forehead so big,
big like Biggie Smalls. I love cock, please bum my hole.
Hi.
What do 3-year-old boys say after going to confession?
"My bum hurts!"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Bum.
Bum who?
Bum holding a pistol!