ASDA jokes

ASDA.

Robber 1: *gets shot in ass*

Robber 2: You have to shit in a bag for life lol.

Robber 1: What, the Tesco or Asda one?

Taking an emo kid grocery shopping does have its perks... You get to scan their wrists for discounts!

What's the benefit of taking a depressed kid to the store?

Scan the wrist and you might get a discount.

If I went to Walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they're barcodes too.

People sometimes ask me why I cut myself. I usually answer that at least I can scan my worth at the supermarket.

Me: tries to scan self at Walmart. I can't scan myself, wanna know why?

Alfred: Why?

Me: because I'm worthless... =)