And jokes

It's funny how you feel so alone with depression, and yet once you tell people on some random website, so many people relate. Unfortunately, it doesn't stop the loneliness.

I saw this one quote: "The people who smile the most are covering the most pain." I think this is true, just not with everyone. As I am really depressed and act like myself with my friends, but with my parents and family, I force a smile so they don't worry more than they do.

I did a test for my therapy session to see what level of depression I had. It came back with severe, 22/24, but I asked her to tell my mum it came back as moderate, saying I would tell her that my depression got worse. She went along with it, but I haven't told my mum and I now make things sound like I aren't as messed up as I truly am to my therapist.

What does Buzz Lightyear and an orphan's parents have in common?

They go to infinity and beyond.

I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a blow dryer.

What do Special Ed kids and fast kids have in common? They like to do things sped up.

What was Michael Jackson's favorite word to say to parents and tabloids? "Leave me alone."

I went for a swim in the river that crosses Mexico, and I saw a Mexican, aka a wetback, swimming across. I asked, and he said, "I'm a wetback."

There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”

Suicide is just freedom, life is just full of pain... Sometimes if you're gone maybe somebody might notice. Feels like life is a maze and the only way to leave is the exit. Nobody notices your pain, your suffering, and that you try your best though everyone notices your mistakes. Life just feels like everyone hates you. Life for me is just faking smiles, I'm not sure how everyone lives such a good life.

What falls to the ground first if an apple and an emo kid fall from a tree?

The apple because the rope caught the emo kid.

What do Hitler and Trump have in common? They both do hand gestures.

What's the difference between a priest and a rapist?

My dad is now a milkman.

Now I have over 50 brothers and sisters.

I know 5 fat people, and your mama is 4 of them.

Guys, this is so wrong. I'm an orphan and this extremely offends me. I'm telling my parents, um.......

My girlfriend asked, "Why is this test so long and hard?"

I then said, "You know what else is long and hard..."

She was amazed!

My grandfather said that ppl rely on technology too much these days, so I thought about what he said and decided to unplug his life support.

My homework was to watch as much porn as I can... and tell my teacher the details so he won't get in trouble for watching it during class.

You know what, I'm done. We are banning "your mom" jokes. They're old, weird, and have been done thousands of times. Just like your mom.

Welcome to Morgan's Morgue and Pizzeria where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!