And jokes
What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common? They both like fairies sitting on them.
If you're bored, hump Danny and fuck him. What is he, goons do fuck rock?
What Happens When You Get Caught On Fire?
— You Lost To Slmebody When You Were Playing Hide And Seek, And The Place Where You Got Caught Was Exactly On A Patch Of Fire.
A girl comes up to her dad and says, "Can I borrow the car tonight? I want to go to this party." Dad says, "If you give a head job..." The girl says, "You're my dad! How can you say that?" Dad says, "If you want the car..." The girl thinks, "Okay." She starts. Dad says, "That tastes like sh*t." Dad: "Yeah, your brother wanted the car this morning."
Bend over and spell run.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
The hooker can wash out her crack and reuse it.
This guy tried to kill me, and I asked, "What is this? Friday the Thirteenth?" Michael replied, "Nah, it's Halloween."
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has claws at the end of paws; a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar...
"GET OUT OF HERE!!!" The Bartender shouts, "We don't serve your type!"
A pun, a play on words, and a limerick walk into a bar.
No joke!
Hey guys! It's Triple G. You can give me more ideas on jokes, mainly Fish and Sea jokes, as those are the jokes I specialize and only do best on in the comment section below. Please do feel free to thumbs down and comment on improvements, as well as thumbsing up and saying what you liked! :)
Au revoir, GGG
How do you confuse a fish?
Put it in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner!
What do you get when you cross a shark and a snowman?
Frostbite!
What's the difference between a piano and a fish?
You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!
Yo momma is like a penny...
Two-faced, worthless, and in everyone's pants!
He drove too far away from the wall, and the cord unplugged.
What are the differences between a preschool and a pedophile's basement? Little kids leave preschool.
What’s Stephen Hawkins favourite shampoo and conditioner?
Head and shoulders.
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg, and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants."
The pirate says, "Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts."
What did the cow and bull do for their first date? - Dinner and a Moovie.