Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Here’s what I did to the kids at the orphanage. I dropkicked 12, lit 10 on fire, comboed 9, punched 3, and murdered 1.

I was working at a check-in station for a flight to Riyadh when suddenly I was approached by Benzema, Kante, and Neymar!

At first I was very surprised and curious, so I asked them why they decided to play in the Saudi Pro League and not MLS where GOAT Messi plays. They all smiled and happily replied: "Don't you know, the legendary bench warmer PRISTIANO PENALDO plays there!"

Now I fully understood what they meant! They know that Pristiano is already finished, so winning trophies will be easy for them. I smiled and happily let them through.

It’s like Sonic always says, “If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?”

What is the difference between paying $50.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole and paying $175.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from an able-bodied bisexual white female who is also a sex worker at a glory hole?

If you give $50.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole you are saving yourself $125.00. 💸😁

Why were the Twin Towers mad?

Because they ordered pepperoni and got plane. (Yes, it's "plain," shut.)

One day I was very happy. I managed to win the lottery and receive a free vacation trip to Saudi Arabia!

Everything was going well until suddenly the FRAUD appeared! It was him, PRISTIANO PENALDO! He dived toward me and grabbed my lottery ticket. I asked him why he is doing this, only for him to reply "I need trip to Saudi Arabia to statpad the PENS!" as he dived back through my window.

Shame on you for stealing my vacation and ruining my day! You are no longer my Idol Pristianooooo!

My friend lives in a caravan park. His parents named him Money because they thought it was a type of currency.

October 1, 2017 is when the Mandalay Bay became the Mandalay spray. Thank Steve for that.

No matter how big the jar, there is one thing that can never fit inside it. What is it?

"Ouch!"

"What's wrong?"

"I stepped on a screw."

"Are you ok?"

"I'm in ex-screw-ciating (excruciating) pain!"