What was the emo kid's pronouns?
Was/were.
Isis is the mark of the beast.
How do parents punish a blind kid? They rearrange the furniture.
My son came to me depressed, so I pointed to the spare bedroom and said, "Hang in here, son."
What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.
You know my first name, but don’t worry about it, you’ll only be screaming my first.
In Israel, they don't have Walmarts; they only have Targets.
What is the number one song played in Columbine High? Smells Like Teen Spirit.
Why can't England play chess? Because they have no queen, and they will soon lose their king.
Why are Muslims not fond of American cops?
Because Muslims don't like pigs!
What's the difference between Kelly Clarkson and a Florida real estate agent?
A Florida real estate agent screws over seniors, Kelly Clarkson screws little children.
I made a song about a tortilla. Well, it's more of a wrap.
Can you imagine the last thing that went through the minds of 9/11 victims?
Well, probably the person in front of them.
I don’t know why people don’t say Cobain because I’m pretty sure Kirk Cobain didn’t miss his last shot like Kobe did
What's the difference between a Palestinian and a redneck?
At least the redneck was drunk when he married his cousin.
What’s the difference between rape and marriage
With marriage you get to keep the screaming woman
What do you call a kid laying down in the classroom Kill confermed
What do you call 3 kids laying down in the classroom Kill streak
What’s the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?
Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.
What’s one thing Obama proved during his presidency
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he’s still going to have the cops on his back
Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
