Worst Jokes Ever

How many babies does it take to paint a wall?

Depends how hard you throw them.

2 + 2 is 4, minus one, that's 3. Quick maths.

The teacher asked her class to use "definitely" in a sentence. Little Johnny raised his hand to answer, yet the teacher passed him and went on to Kevin. "The sky is definitely blue." "Very good Kevin, but the sky can also be blue or black," the teacher replied.

Little Johnny raised his hand again as high as he could, yet the teacher passed right over him and picked Annie from the back of the room. "The grass is definitely green." "Very good Annie, but it can also be brown." Little Johnny was waving his hand like crazy seeking her attention. Finally, she called on him. "Mine's more of a question, but do farts have lumps in them?" "Why no, Johnny, why would you ask such a question?" She questioned. "Well, if they don't have lumps in them, then I definitely just shit myself."

What's the difference between a baby and a baked potato?

About 140 calories.

How do you make a cat sound like a dog?

You set it on fire; then it goes, "WOOF!"

Super Boy from Korea.

Little Johnny went to the doctor to get an infection checked on his penis. As the doctor examined it, he asked, "Lil Johnny how did you get an infection on your penis?" Johnny replied, "Well, the damn neighbor Sally's braces are too sharp."

Them: "You're ugly."

Me: "No, as ugly as your extra chromosome."

Fuck off!

Kenshiro is already dead.

Yo mama's so stupid that she studied for her eye test.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick up your ass.

Why did the legless kid think he won a race?

Because everybody already left.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?

Juan on juan.

What's better than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree?

One dead baby nailed to ten!

Is it just me, or when you wipe your ass too deep, it reminds you of your uncle? Just me?

I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”

When I was little, I would pray to Jesus every night for him to get me a new bike. I learned one week in Sunday school that that's not how it works, so instead I just stole one and asked him for forgiveness.

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

What is a frog's favorite drink?

Croaka-cola!