Worst Jokes Ever

Well, I saw a stripper, and she was trying out bread.

I saw someone who was about to jump off a bridge. They were wearing a Nike "JUST DO IT" shirt.

Are your forehead and hairline old friends because they go way back?

Is your dad Spider-Man, because he got no way home?

Yo mama so fat, she went to space and there was no space left.

I had to stop drinking because I got tired of waking up in my car, driving 90.

My dad came out of my step-sister's room as I came out of my step-mum's room.

Your hairline is like a lollipop because every time someone licks it, it gets shorter.

"Pray to God her inside her head. I'm scared of God."

Wanna hear something twisted?

A pretzel.

All zodiac signs have their hairstyles. Except cancer.

"Yo mama is so fat that when I buried her, she made the Earth round."

My enemy told me I’m adopted, so I told him at least I got adopted.

What do you call an orphan's family picture?

A selfie.

It’s like I always tell my kids:

"Two in the pink, one in the stink."

I read a sign. What it meant to say is, "You matter, don't give up." What I read was, "You don't matter, give up."

What do you call an LGBTQ person getting grilled? LGBBQ.

I don't got a pencil or pen in this bookbag. Added like ten to the clip 'cause it look bad. Don't give a fuck if you pissed, nigga, get mad. Or you can bitch and get killed with your bitch ass. Lil' bro got blood on his shirt with his Crip ass. Go write a diss and get murked, don't do shit ass. Bitch, I'm a star, I might burst with my stiff ass. Hop out the car like, "Who want it? Who with that?" I don't know nothin', I was gone when they did that. Bandana wrapped where my chrome and my wig at. If he want beef, hit his home with a Big Mac. Niggas be breakin' the code like a Kit-Kat. Runnin' your mouth like a ho get you bitch-slapped.

I bought an orphan kid an iPhone.

Guess what? It had no home button.

My grandma used to beat the hell out of me for coming home late. Guess who's late now?