Worst Jokes Ever
Why are English people bad at chess? 'Cause they lost their Queen.
Why can't the US play chess? 'Cause they lost their towers.
I'm sure you could be the smartest person in your class.
If it were a class for the profoundly retarded.
What's the difference between me and Spongebob?
Spongebob can actually get ripped.
Why does Mini P.E.K.K.A. love pancakes? Because he is busy watching explicit content involving the Archers and Firecracker.
What do you call a pig in a blanket?
My wife on a cold day.
Why were the Twin Towers made on 9/11? They ordered pepperoni pizza but got plane.
Why can't the English play chess? Because they lost their queen. And why can't the US play chess? Because they lost their towers.
Why does everyone say there are mines in Bosnia? There are no-
What does a stuttering Santa call Mrs. Claus?
A hoe hoe hoe.
How many babies do you need to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Why can't a homeless person be seen around your wife?
Because she'll ask for her cardboard box! Ahahah.
What is a Care Bear's favorite job?
Take care of bears.
I gave a homeless person a phone but did not give him a home button.
You know the saying, "Third time's the charm?"
Well, Germany lost twice.
I bet Steven Hawking $100 if he could catch me.
As soon as he said yes, I climbed up the stairs.
Why can't orphans open a website?
Because they don't have a home page.
America's police phone number is 911 because that is the day they lost everything.
Knock knock. Who’s there? We ask the questions!!!!!!!!
Why are priests so bad at racing? They are always in the 'little behind'.
When you were late to school and your teacher called you tardy, she meant that in more ways than one.