Worst Jokes Ever
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 Victims, they went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
Why was Helen Keller's belly button bruised?
Her boyfriend was blind too.
This one kid I knew had Down syndrome, and he turned a mirror upside down trying to get rid of it.
And the lord said unto John, "Come forth and you will receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
How many gay guys can you fit on a bar stool? Four, just flip it over.
What do you call a Catholic priest who molests children?
A Catholic priest.
When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.
But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)
Knock knock. Who's there? Bear. Bear who? Bear bum!
What do you call an Asian prostitute?
Suck Mi Dong.
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
Did you know that Germany came up with sparkling water?
Who else would think of adding gas?
The judge asked me, "How does 5 to 10 years sound?"
I said, "Sexy."
I can see your cameltoe, you nasty thot!
God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.
What did the Hiroshima survivor say about the day Little Boy dropped? "It was a blast!"
Why did the picture go to jail?
Cause it was framed!
Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there's no multiplying.
At a date:
He: "I work with animals every day."
Me: "Oh, how sweet! What do you do?"
He: "I'm a butcher."
How do you get an emo out of a tree?
Cut the rope.
What's the difference between Jesus and the baby I have in my basement?
Jesus died a virgin.