Worst Jokes Ever
This guy goes to a bar and pulls out a little guy playing the piano. The bartender asks him where he got a small man with a piano.
The guy points outside to a genie granting people wishes. The bartender runs out and 1 million ducks appear.
The bartender yells at the genie saying, “Are you fucking deaf? I asked for 1 million bucks, not 1 million bucks!”
The guy from the bar says, “No shit! You think I really asked for a 12-inch pianist?”
Kermit the Frog and Fozzie Bear were having a picnic.
Fozzie said, "Do you know where Ms. Piggy is? I haven't seen her all day."
Kermit said, "I don't know, but this extra bacon cheeseburger sure tastes great."
"Your pussy is sweeter than Mom's," Brother admired his sister.
"I know," replied Sister. "Father told me too."
About to go on a date.
But she was late.
So I got some tape.
And eventually punished her with rape.
Your mom gave me a three course meal last night:
Starters - Foreplay
Main course - Reverse Cowgirl
Dessert - Blowy
Won't forget the side drink of an individual on individual bukkake.
Your mom's ass is so petite and big, I'd pound that till the Earth shakes.
Your mom has quite the mouth on her.
As I found out last night. Oh, what a night!! 😏 😉 😜
Did you hear about the bull who went on a shooting rampage?
I guess he was a little deranged.
Why is a ghost so predictable?
Because you can see right through it.
Comic: God, you're a fuckin' virgin, aren't you?!
Gerald: No! I've been 'round the block loads of times; women practically drool over me.
Comic: Yeah, and the Archbishop of Banterbury, mate. A name like Gerald, and with added 'four eyes' like them shit pair of glasses from FOUR EYED SPECCY INSTITUTION, mate, the only woman your dick has been in was when you were inside your mom's womb.
What is the best game for a deaf person?
Charades.
What is a deaf person's favorite game?
Charades.
My girlfriend called me pedophile today.
Big word for a 12-year-old.
What does a cop say when you shoot a ginger?
I guess orange is the new black.
How come you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to be a fruit, when you’re already a vegetable.
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A saltshaker.
Knock knock.
Who is there?
WE WILL ASK THE QUESTIONS!
What does a woman and a hurricane have in common?
They’re nice and wet at first, but in the end they take everything.
Political correctness has gone too far! You have to say "cognitive decline" rather than "Alzheimer's ridden shitbag"!
Trump should be grateful for DEI.
How else could a mentally handicapped person be elected President?