If trees could kill you, they wood.
Worst Jokes Ever
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?
It is ground breaking!
What's the best thing about abortion jokes?
They never get old.
What did the deaf man say to the blind man before he fell into the well?
Nothing.
Why did the blind man fall down the well?
He couldn't see that well.
The cat said hi.
What's the best part of having sex on a golf course?
The hole experience.
What do you call it when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
Have you ever tried North Korean food?
Neither have the North Koreans.
How did the inkjet printer kill himself?
He drank cyan-ide.
Why do sharks swim in salt water?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
Oral sex will make your whole day. Anal sex will make your hole weak.
What do you call a Russian tree?
Dimitree.
What's better than roses on a piano?
Tulips on an organ.
What did Tennessee do?
The same thing Arkansas did.
How does Moses make his coffee?
Hebrews it.
Why don't Romans find algebra interesting?
X is always 10.
What's the difference between light and hard?
It's easy to get to sleep with a light on.
What's a cannibal's favorite dessert?
Lady fingers.
What does a shark and a computer have in common?
They both have megabytes.