Worst Jokes Ever
Why haven't they just tried turning Stephen Hawking on and off?
You know you trip and fall. Here is the funny joke: Did you have a nice trip?
Person 1: Hey, did you hear about the circus fire?
Person 2: No.
Person 1: It was in-tents.
What’s made of wood and is zig zag shaped?
Stephen Hawking's coffin.
I once had a trash can as a girlfriend.
I was ready to break up with her, but all she had to say was, "Please don't dump me!" Then I said, "Sorry, I'm ready to take out the trash."
I hope there is a lift to heaven. I shouldn’t be making jokes though.
The other day a man with some cheese and milk attacked me... how dairy!
When it comes to recycling toilet paper, you really need to process the crap out of it.
Stephen Hawking tried comedy.
His first line ruined it. "You know what I can't stand? Let me rephrase that, you know what? I can't stand."
What's the best part about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
What do they call me when I jack off?
Pulled pork.
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowgirl?
Snowballs.
I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible.
Lol, mum's gay.
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not Stephen Hawking.
Whet
A young blonde woman fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a shop and buys a handgun.
The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. The hysterical blonde tells her husband: "Shut up... you're next!"
What's the best thing about having sex with a 26-year-old?
There's 20 of them.
Why was the chef embarrassed?
He saw the salad dressing.
Trystan Leonard is going out with Katelynn O'Toole.