Worst Jokes Ever
What does Stephen King call his wife...
The black hole.
Stephen Hawking missed assembly this morning.
What’s black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Rosa Parks.
Lol.
Heard Stephen Hawking is in a new movie and that the theme tune is absolutely banging. Think the opening line goes something like, “They see me rolling, they hating.”
Two cows are standing in a field.
Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease?
Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter.
A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question can go home."
A boy throws his bag out the window.
The teacher asks, "Who just threw that?"
The boy says, "Me! I'm going home now."
Well, I don't have a joke but... I have a poem.
My dick is red, your pussy is blue. I... lied to you.
Wanna hear a joke? You.
pussi
What is worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies.
What's worse than that? The one at the bottom is still alive.
What is worse still? It has to eat its way out.
What's worse than that? It went back for seconds.
Why did lil Susie fall off the swing? She didn’t have any arms.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Not lil Susie.
What do you call a retard in a house fire?
Flame Retardant.
What do you call a Roman with hair in his teeth?
A "glad-he-ate-her".
What did one lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire?
Same time next month?
James: I have a joke. Sex!
Ronny: I don't get it.
James: Exactly.
Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington's nose.
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking in a house fire.
My mum told me to stop playing with my sister. She said, "At least wait for her to be born first."
How did the dead baby cross the road?
It was strapped to the chicken.
Why should you stay away from trees? - Because they wanna be leafed alone.