Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call vampire Matt Damon?
Bat Damon!
A man went to a Ford dealership hoping to find a car, but he said they weren't affordable.
What happened when the dog played golf?
He hit the ball into the ruff.
I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a ladder the other day and I thought, huh, that's a little con-descending.
Who is Barry B. Benson’s favorite classical composer?
Bee-thoven.
You guys asked for a joke? Well, you're in luck, because you already are one!
A man is sitting in a chair. He is talking to the other friend about what they must cherish.
One says he cherishes his family, the other cherishes his parents, and a man comes in, points at the chair and says, “I CHAIRish my Chair” as he pulls up a chair.
I got a chicken drum stick for lunch, thought I might drum up an appetite!
I'm happy that I named my dog "I Know What You Did." It's funny to see how much people get scared when I call him.
Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 was a registered *sex* offender.
Your face with my cum.
How do Germans tie their shoes? Answer: In Nazis!
What did the grape say when he got squished? Nothing, he just let out a little wine.
This is mean af. Y'all need to stop this. Like, what the f *ck? What would happen if you all grew up and you were like this? Like, damn.
Did you hear about the mad who got his whole left side cut off? He's all right now.
Justin Masotti
Why can't the toilet paper cross the road? Because it got stuck in a crack!
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Mary Rose sat on a pin. Mary Rose!
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."