Worst Jokes Ever
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos.
Then I made pizza because they don’t live in a swing state.
Are you Jeffrey Dahmer? Because I'd love you to eat me.
What does Michael Jackson get high on? A little crack.
How do you stop a MeToo feminazi from telling the world about being raped? Easy: just rape her mouth shut.
I have a choking kink, so I will enjoy hanging.
Osama's aim was horrible. One of his angry birds missed and hit a field in Pennsylvania.
I hate the term feminazi. It is offensive to real Nazis.
What do you call a lamp that molests young boys? A Jacko Lantern!
Not a joke, but this needs saying. Please can someone do something about all the pedo posts on here. It’s honestly just nasty.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?
One is made of plastic and bad for kids; the other one holds shopping.
ADHD stands for Attention Deficit Hey Donut.
What’s the difference between Jeffrey Dahmer and a priest?
They both like lil' boys.
Did you hear about that musical that was sung by some obsidian?
It rocked!
What's an orphan's favorite Roblox game?
Adopt Me.
What's the similarities between dark humor and cancer?
It's funnier when kids get it.
Yo mama so UGLY... at the strip club... people pay her... to keep her clothes ON!!!
Bobby had 54 dicks (54).
He took 33 pills a month (5433).
Once he ran out of pills, he was left with 45 dicks (543345).
(Flip the calculator once you got the full number. 543345! He's got a lot!
Me: "The villain has a point, you know."
Everyone else watching the WW2 documentary:
Why do more women than men oppose abortion? Because they prefer not to get raped.
"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.
“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.