Worst Jokes Ever
I got arrested on suspicion of attempted rape all because I was carrying some cable ties, a bit of tape and a piece of cloth. It's such a joke, I hadn't even bought the chloroform yet.
I love eating pussy. That’s why the animal shelter is always my go-to for a good meal.
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
Joe mama so fat when she got sturdy, she tripped on her shoelaces, fell on her face, and fell down 2 floors.
Yo mama so ugly, when she looks in a mirror, it says, "Viewer discretion advised!"
Your mama is so ugly, her shadow got a restraining order.
Joe Mama so weird, she cut her hair in a squiggly diggly haircut.
Bad Hitler puns are infuhrerating.
You are so ugly, when the devil saw you, he said, "Jesus Christ!"
Your hairline is so pushed back, it's looking like it got slapped up by Will Smith.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Your mum's so fat, she broke Britain too!
Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, “I want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.”
Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. “Mein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?”
Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. “You see, no one cares about the Jews.”
My dad just found out and told my mom about one of their friends, Chad, who just murdered his wife, Claire. After doing that, he turned the gun on himself and committed suicide right after.
My mom's reply: "Jesus, Chad will do anything to get out of cleaning his mess, won't he?"
How do you get away with rape and incest in California?
Say you identify as a woman. Fact: It's actually legal to rape your daughter if you are a woman in California.
What do you call a virgin kid locked in a room with a pedophile? Past tense.
If a fat person were to go on a flying car, it will just be at the ground. When they exit, it will just fly up.
It's just been discovered that as well as writing a book, Adolf Hitler also wrote one of the first computer games, "Mein Kraft."
When does a pentagon not have 5 sides?
When it’s intersected by a plane.
People call my blind friend dumb sometimes.
She can't see the obvious.
How do you surprise a blind man? Put a plunger in the toilet.