Worst Jokes Ever

Your mom is so fat that she can't get internet because she is worldwide.

What is Michael Jackson's favorite instrument? A small skin flute.

You're hairline is like I was so fat Dora the Explorer couldn't find your numbers!

"In chess, a queen can move in more directions than the king."

I mean, yeah, the chessboard looks like a kitchen floor, so-

A lion, Johnny Depp, and a hockey player from Nashville all have one thing in common.

They're all Predators!

Looking out for becoming a pilot, can y'all suggest some good mosques?

Don't want to learn the landing part, though, Allah said it's unnecessary.

Give a blind kid a gun and tell him it's a hair dryer.

I don't usually make 9/11 jokes. They always go down in flames.

My dad is really angry at me for kicking the balls. He's the one that told me always aim for them. Is that why I don't have a brother?

Why did the cheetah get sad?

'Cause it didn't have any balls to suck.

I was joking about self-harm to my friend, and she told me to "CUT it out!" I couldn't even laugh.

When we were at the self-checkout, she started scanning my arms. I asked her what she was doing. She said, "Trying to see if it beeps, ya think I'd get it to work if I scanned your thighs?"

I said, "Nah, bro, you'd overload the system if you put it there."

What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an orphan?

An orphan has all their teeth intact.

Did you hear about the guy who dipped his balls in glitter? Pretty nuts!

I got a PS5 for my nine-year-old sister. At the time, I thought it was the best trade I’d ever made. But now I’m regretting not being able to molest her anymore.

Your mom said, "Can you get to the dick game?"

Your hairline is so far back, Paw Patrol couldn't finish their mission.

Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.

Dr. Fauci would be surprised to know that R. Kelly didn't catch COVID-19.

But since COVID is 19, it's too old for him.

My mate caught me sniffing his disabled sister's knickers the other day. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she was wearing them at the time. It made the rest of the funeral so awkward.

If a person kills their counselor, does that mean that they don't need therapy anymore?