Worst Jokes Ever
An emo and a leaf fall out of a tree. Which hits the ground first? The leaf. The rope stopped the emo.
What's the most optimistic blood type? B+.
What disease causes wrinkled clothes? An iron deficiency.
These jokes are a little too explosive, if you ask me.
Do you get jealous of your clothes when they hang from the line?
What do cannibals eat to freshen their teeth?
Mentos.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just sit in the dark and cry.
The 911 people really didn't scramble fast enough, so they got folded like an omelet.
How did Santa feel when he got stuck in the chimney?
Claus-trophobic.
Christopher Walkin: "This is a literal universal remote! It actually controls your life! You can pause, you can rewi-"
Me: power button.
1+1=3
If you don't use a condom.
Why is the orphan failing all his classes? He can't do homework.
Mom told me to get more in touch with my feminine side. So, I crashed the car.
Two whores are watching the sun come up, splitting a bottle of Mad Dog and celebrating another night of servicing the general public. One asks the other: "Say. You ever been picked up by the fuzz?"
Her friend thinks it over, "No...but I have been swung around by the tits a few times!"
A missionary went to visit an orphanage in Thailand. After looking around, he asked the manager, "Why do these kids have numbers instead of names on their shirts? And why are some of them the same?"
The manager smiled and said, "Those are price tags."
Timmy had 66 toys. He said it was "2 many (662)," so he gave them to Mr. Divide. He gave 21. Equals flip it over! It’s weird.
How is the world like a box of crayons?
Nobody likes the white ones.
And a side note, it's multi colored.
I told an orphan his dad is Spider-Man: Far From Home.
Blue: The ocean is a place where the creatures live.
Black: NIGHTMARES LIVE!
Blue: It has many pretty things and it will-
Black: KILL YA TO DEATH! Especially if you are on Titanic! So let that sink in. PUN INTENDED!
To start off this Christmas season, I'ma make a list of what I want, then I'ma make plans with my family, then to start off my decorations, I'ma start with the first ornament and hang myself.
My dad died in 9/11. At least he did what he loves best: flying planes.