Worst Jokes Ever
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
The earth used to be flat.
Till they buried yo mama.
What do parents feeding their kids and terrorists have in common?
“Here comes the airplane!”
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? One of them gets picked.
Hello, I am back with more mind-blowing facts.
1. Why are cookies called cookies and bacon called bacon when you bake cookies and cook bacon?
2. If you tuck your shirt into your trousers and it is called tucking your shirt in, does that mean if your shirt is over your trousers, doesn't that mean it's called tucking your trousers into your shirt?
Flat girls be like, "I will have breasts in the future." This is to all the flat girls: you will never get it.
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
Home Alone.
You're so fat when you walk into the mall, you *are* the mall.
Your hairline receded just like your father did years ago.
Why is Cinderella bad at soccer?
She keeps on running from the ball.
Man, your hairline is so bad it started from the beginning of the month to the end!
There should be a "kick an orphan" day.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Yo momma so stupid that she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
My grandma's got 99 problems, but a fat butt ain't one of 'em.
1 like = 1 more missile aimed at a hospital.
1 like = 1 kid in my oven. I'm trying to get followers and comments, please.
Shut the fuck up, you fat bitch. You always like to roast others, but you can't walk up the stairs without passing out, you fat, stupid bitch. And I caught you breaking into someone's house just to steal a piece of candy, fat-ass bitch.
Me: Hey Siri, did you know Candice died?
Siri: Yes, I was informed she died from sugondese.
Me: What is that?
Siri: Sugondese nuts.
All orphans must hate the LGBTQIA+ because they are home-o-phobic.
You’re so fat that when you sit on the toilet, it says, “A B C D E F G, get your butt off of me!”