How do you make a trash can leak?
Hit it with an axe until it becomes part of the cosmos!
How do you make a trash can leak?
Hit it with an axe until it becomes part of the cosmos!
What does an autistic kid and a porn video have in common? You can shoot both of them, just not in public.
Did you hear that Michael Jackson once got food poisoning?
He ate 12-year-old nuts.
Me: “You guys wanna know a cool fact?”
Friend 1: “Yeah.”
Friend 2: “Yea.”
Me: “Japan is RIGHT that way. If we swim all night...we’ll be able to get to Japan.”
Friend 3: “I love anime.”
Friend 1 & 2: “Nononononononononono!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Me: *Laughs at Friend 3*
It's way too soon for Kobe jokes.
They never land well.
Everyone tells me I need to stop making prostitute jokes.
I guess they're whore-ible.
Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.
Yo mama so old, her photos are in a museum and her friends are in a graveyard.
Hitler only wanted peace.
A piece of Poland, a piece of Czechoslovakia, and a piece of Turkey.
vgvgvgh.
Her: "Land of the free".
Me: *fat*
Her: What do you mean?
Me: It's not fat-free.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
I can't think of any jokes.
What has nut, long, big, and sticky? A Snickers bar.
Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? Idaho, Alaska?
What it actually means: Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? I don’t know. I’ll ask her.
P.S. My dad is a history teacher and he told me to put this in here.
Why did the chef go get the eggs? Because eggs are egg-tastic!
I hate nightmares.