Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between my father and acne?
Acne waited for me to be a teenager before coming on my face.
Grandma: "Y’know, I used to be in this wheelchair cause of back pain. But ever since I met Spence, the pain went to my legs. At least my back is fixed!"
Yo momma's an ICE agent!
You were probably voted "Most Likely to Become an Ice agent" in school.
How do terrorists feed their kids?
"Here comes the airplane... and then the second!"
Yo cuando no hago la tarea.
Who is going to start the robot takeover? Me.
Julius Caesar & Tork Poettschke at the doctor's office:
"The doctor has now sent me the bill."
"Make him aware of his duty of confidentiality!"
Barack Obama and Tork Poettschke are at the Natural History Museum. They stop in front of a showcase.
"These are the eggs from the ostrich!"
"Aha, and where are Trump's eggs?"
Louis Armstrong and Tork Poettschke go for a walk.
One says to the other, "My wife always says that icke is no worse than the other men."
"How many men does your wife have?"
Your hairline’s going backwards in Ohio.
your hair line goes so far the dinosaurs will see it
Why cant Americans play chess?
Because they lost their towers...
Joe Rogan to Christopher Doemges: "What can you tell me about musicians of the 18th century?" Doemges: "They're all dead already!"
What do you call a retarded Mexican?
Ricardo.
My nephew hated working outside in landscaping, so I got him a job in the twin towers; I don't know why he keeps complaining about it being an inside job.
When do we think the Empire State Building is going to be shot down?
What do you call a riot full of white people?
An avalanche.
My friend's mom once told me that when Trump was elected president, she said to my friend: "Hey look, an orange became president. We got an orange as a president before a girl as president."
I say we shouldn’t do any jokes about dogs cause dogs are the best, but cats suck.