What's the difference between a puppy and an orphan?
Puppies get adopted.
Worst Jokes Ever
What is an orphan's least favorite store? Home Depot.
Waitress: What can I get for you?
Me: I'll have a steak.
Waitress: How would you like it?
Me: Immediately!
*gets hit by a car*
Passerby: "ARE YOU OKAY?"
Me: "Please...I need my...phone."
*opens twitter*
Me: "LMFAOOOOOOO YALL GUESS WHAT"
What do you call a sad rabbit? Unhoppy.
Why isn't there a sad sunglasses emoji? To show that I am happy but I'm still cool.
What does a pedophile call an orphanage?
A supermarket.
Why did the orphan stop playing baseball?
Because baseball has a home, and an orphan does not.
Laugh now.
The only doctor you have is Doctor Pepper.
You're so fat, that you're fat.
Dad: Hey, uh... you're adopted.
Dog: *frown*
What do me and an emo kid have in common:
We both like to hang.
Your hairline so far back, it's a wide receiver for the Minnesota Vikings.
Why is America bad at Clash of Clans?
Because they already lost two towers.
Yo mama so ugly, when she went to the ugly club, they said, "Sorry, professionals only!"
Why were the twin towers fighting?
Because they ordered pepperoni, but they got plain.
What is white, blue eyed, blonde haired and somehow was made in Galilee during the Roman occupation?
An Italian Renaissance painting that was carbon dated.
The only letters in the alphabet that you know are "KFC."
When was the last time you saw yourself in the mirror?
The first time you have to do a full body workout in chess.
Why did the cheetah lose in chess? Because he played against cheetahs!
