Worst Jokes Ever
What is the autistic woman’s favorite Dorito flavor?
Neurospicy.
What did the autistic man order at McDonald’s?
Ass Burgers.
What Minecraft mob do autistic people relate to the most?
The Enderman.
Why don’t autistic people like Autism Speaks?
They’re jealous that autism can speak.
(This is not meant to be triggering, sorry if it is).
Alright, class, we have 39 students and 40 seats.
That one dyslexic kid thinking he’s Superman:
What is a dog's favorite snack?
RUFFles.
Name: Jack, call sign "triple".
School: Nova corps gun academy.
Location: Wyoming mountains.
First bite: Oh my God!
Second bite: Oh my, God!
Most people think an octopus has 8 legs.
Actually, they have 6 legs and 2 arms. How can you tell which are the arms?
Hit it on the head. The two that go up to the head when he says "Owwww" are his arms.
Little Timmy is hanging out with Rapunzel, and he mentions Hugo and a few other characters from Varian And The Seven Kingdoms, and she responds with, “Who the frick are you talking about? Since I don’t know them, I got a surprise for you!” She wraps him up in Christmas wrapping paper labeled "For Eugene."
I saw a fortune teller the other day. She told me I would come into some money.
Last night, I fucked a chick named Penny. What are the odds?
Do you remember blowing bubbles when you were younger?
Well, Bubbles is back in town and was asking about you!
Why is flour retarded?
Because it's in-bread.
This joke is so corny I could eat it off the cob.
What is a vegetarian's favorite song?
No beef.
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One turns to the other and says, "I think I've lost my electron."
The other asks, "Are you sure?"
"Yes," the first says, "I'm positive!"
A blind man once told me he smokes a lot because he has nothing to look forward to. Well, let's just say that I see his point.
I should probably stop making emo jokes.
They just don't seem to cut it anymore.
I tried having a three-way with two physicists, but they couldn't solve the three-body problem.
What's the difference between PMS and a terrorist?
You can negotiate with the terrorist.