What's the difference between me and a hairdresser? We both cut too much.
Worst Jokes Ever
I know this place may be cruel, but hang in there!
What is the similarity of a bomb and a baby?
When you drop them both, everyone screams.
When your mum went to the UK and wore a yellow jacket, everyone started yelling "Taxi! Taxi!"
Q: What do bloods eat when they get sick?
A: Chicken noodle suwoop.
Why do orphans go to church?
So they can call someone father!
Friends: "You wanna hang with us?"
Me: "No, I wanna hang myself."
You learn from the best.
Q: Why can’t orphans be criminals?
A: They are not wanted.
Sex is basically math. You add the bed. Subtract the clothes. Divide the legs to multiply inside.
People wear chokers, and I'm a choker too, because I tried to choke myself 6 times.
Who is the definition of a natural-born cocksucker?
A bisexual male, a homosexual male, a bisexual female, or a heterosexual female?
A physically disabled heterosexual male.
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
The snowballs.
Yo momma's so ugly, her birth certificate was an apology letter.
What animal can jump the highest?
Emo kids because once they go up they never come back.
Just saw the news that Kobe passed. I guess there's a first for everything.
What is the difference between the Leaning Tower of Pisa and the Twin Towers? The Tower of Pisa is more flexible.
What’s the difference between an emo and a pack of Oreos? The emo’s barcode gets longer every day.
My four conditions:
1. I need coffee.
2. I need vacation.
3. I need food.
4. I need tape, axe, saw, bag, shovel, and an alibi.
What do you call a physically disabled man who is sitting on the toilet inside the handicapped stall inside the men's restroom?
Sex worker.
Why is September 11th the best birthday? No one forgets it!