Worst Jokes Ever
Here is a dark joke for you guys... "Why do pornstars scream, "DADDY!" in their videos? Because they were child molested by their father!"
I just quit my job at a can crushing factory.
It was soda-pressing.
What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.
What do you get when I get mixed with coffee?
De-presso.
How do you make epileptic kids dance?
Throw a flash bang in their room.
Do you have dark humor?
Actually, never mind. I was going to tell you a joke about babies dying... but I decided to abort.
What do angels serve at birthday parties in Heaven?
Angel food cake! 🎂🥳
How do you find a blind man at a nude beach?
It isn't hard.
What type of tape do kidnappers use?
Abduct-Tape.
I saw this really old guy with the Hitler stache, so I decided to start beating him up.
It was very weird when a camera crew came out with Harrison Ford and started yelling at me.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant person?
A Kinder Surprise.
What do you call a cow that's beating his meat? Beef stroganoff!
A suicide bomber's biggest fear is dying alone.
Women have less rights than a NASCAR track.
Who is the only person time waits for? Nun.
Why doesn't China have a cricket team?
They always eat the bat.
Wonder why the British are so good at chess? They have the queen.
Wonder why Americans are so bad at chess? They lost two towers.
What’s the difference between my lawn and my wrists?
Nothing, I cut both of them.
Other girls be like, "I want a 6ft guy", meanwhile I want to be 6ft under. 😃👍
Tomorrow is Christmas, and I'm giving myself a present that I can't wait to open. It's my wrist. (Yes, this was inspired by a Fall Out Boy song.)