Worst Jokes Ever
Bf: "Roses are red, violets are blue, you're my bf and I luv you."
Gf: "I luv u too."
Bf: "But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, I heard you were cheating, I'll knock off your head."
Gf: "Ah, about that..."
Yo hairline be lookin' like Elmo's toe fungus.
Little Johnny's mom is taking a shower. Little Johnny walks in and asks, "What is that in between your legs?" Mommy says, "That is my keyhole." The next day, Little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and Little Johnny asks, "What is that in between your legs?" Daddy says, "That is my key." The next day Little Johnny says to his dad, "Looks like the neighbor has the key to Mommy's keyhole too."
Roses are red and violets are blue, my best friend is Sue, and she's blue, too.
(meaning sad)
Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he doesn't know if he is black or white.
Why is a white guy in prison scarier than a black guy in prison?
The white guy actually did it.
Q: How do you cover a Chinese's eyes?
A: Use dental floss.
America has white people that are terrorists and racists. They love to blame people from different countries for what they have done.
White person: "We are not terrorists. Why would [we] ever do that in our history?"
The rest of the people: *looks at them stupid* "Y'all were the first motherfuckers to be a terrorist first and then wanting to blame others for your action."
1 person: "You still carrying that confederate flag. It means hatred and [you're] still trying to fight to bring back slaves again. Y'all say it's heritage and not hate, but [you're] clearly still a fucking loser, and your flag has an X [on it, which] means wrong. So... Still a loser. People can't be racist to a racist. It just doesn't make sense. I'm not saying all white people are racist, but I am talking about the ones who voted for Trump and be blind as hell. FUCK DONALD TRUMP AND THE RACIST PEOPLE!"
I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage.
I lost the case.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
Michael doesn’t fart. Jackson does.
What category of music did JFK like?
You could say he was a metalhead.
Doctor: I diagnose you with obesity.
Patient: It runs in the family.
Doctor: Nothing can run in your family.
To everyone saying, "Don't joke about suicide, it's not even funny to laugh about people dying." Do you think we have it easy? Have you ever thought these jokes were helping us to cope? Mind your own business and don't make assumptions on people you know nothing about, please and thanks.
Why was the ant so confused? Because all his uncles were ants.
Bf: What do you think about our love?
Gf: Count the stars in the sky.
Bf: Aww, it's infinity.
Gf: Nope, just a waste of time.
Incest. A game the whole family can play.
Why do dwarfs laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
What do you call me?
Chinese?
Marcus is gay.