We clap when we see you. We clap our hands over our eyes.
Worst Jokes Ever
Your family is so poor, when you knocked on the door for money, I offered you a penny, and when you knocked again, the rock answered and knocked you out.
Your mum is so fat, all her relationships are long distance.
Your mum is so overdue on eBay for £2 so she could get a male stripper.
Did you hear about the "Funny Doctor"?
He'll have you in "Stitches"!
Why do people never kick their own balls?
Because they might lose one!
"One man's trash is another man's treasure" is a great thing to say to someone; horrible way to find out you're adopted.
Turn the comments into a kindergarten fight.
Mom: Please eat, baby!
Baby: No!
Mom: Here comes the airplane!
What does the Trump administration use instead of emails? Alternative fax.
My friend and I were joking about a kid in a wheelchair, and another kid came up and said to the wheelchair kid, "You should stand up for yourself."
Orphan: Asks you random joke. What is the difference between my boomerang and my parents?
Me: The boomerang came back.
Your dad left for the milk because of your McDonald's hairline!
I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.
If the sun is in space, then why is there light on Earth, but not in space?
Hey guys, I have a question.
Doesn't everyone's parents tell them don't take candy from strangers? Then what is Halloween?
If Earth is the 3rd planet from the sun, does that mean that every country is a 3rd world country?
Three men die at the same time and go to Heaven. St. Peter says to them, "It's going to be a long journey to heaven, so I will give you a good vehicle depending on how much you've cheated on your wives."
"We'll start with you, Michael. Since you were quite the womanizer and cheated on your wife multiple times, you will be getting a Toyota." The man, embarrassed, left in the Toyota.
"Nolan, you were better; you cheated on your wife twice, so I will give you a Mercedes. Now, as for you, Mark, you never cheated on your wife; you are an absolute saint, so I will be giving you a Lamborghini."
The man in the Toyota saw the man with the Lamborghini the next day crying like a child on his car, and he asked the man in the Lamborghini, "What the hell is going on?"
The man in the Lamborghini says, "I just saw my wife riding through the streets of Heaven on roller skates!"
Yo mama so fat, when she went on the weighing scale, it said, "To be continued."
Why is the Tower of Pisa leaning? Because it has better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
