Worst Jokes Ever
I just had sex...
I think I nailed it!
(Shit joke, I know.)
Why are lesbians bad at math?
Because they can't multiply.
Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
I told my wife I needed a blood transfusion when I could not remember. She said, "Be positive too."
Bad, I am now a ghost writing this.
Why do disabled people not like comedians?
Because they do stand up.
Who is the most horny and fat ass god?
Kim Jung Un.
What's the best way to catch a fish? Ask someone to throw it to you.
I asked my friend what happened to him?
His balance shifted.
My dad told me "No electronics at the table," so I unplugged my grandma's life support.
My son came to me depressed, so I pointed to the spare bedroom and said, "Hang in here, son."
What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.
What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
They can't see their parents.
Why can lesbians not drive cars?
They always strap the wrong thing on.
Why are women’s feet so small?
So they can stand closer to the sink.
This is not a joke. Stop online dating.
What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while you’re asleep.
A child, molester, and priest walk into a bar.
He orders a drink.
The other day I went to a museum. My friend and I went to the Holocaust section, and he got choked up when he saw the Anne Frank picture. I asked him, "Why are you sad? It's just an ashtray."
What is the difference between women and cars?
At least one of them retained their value after getting wrecked.